Going to start by apologizing to Nathan, apparently, he isn't the only one who thinks I'm currently dating Mr. X. Let me set the record straight for those of you who are confused, I'm not currently nor do I ever plan on dating him.
We have a love/hate relationship and currently I'm in hate with that love/hate relationship. It actually has nothing to do with him for a change. I'm just bored with it all. It's time for a new challenge, preferably one that isn't such a time waster.
Since this is my last post of the year. What I'd normally do is hash out all the many mistakes of the past year in a bid to stop you from following in my footsteps. But this year I feel oddly at peace with everything.
Yeah, some things didn't go my way but in the big picture I played my cards right. It's that life lesson “you can play your hand perfectly, and still lose”. I don't think I have lost anything important, besides, maybe my mind.
I don't do New Year’s resolutions, I think the whole concept is stupid, but I do like to take a deep breath and release all the bullshit from the previous year. I know this time in 12 months it will be a whole new list of bullshit bugging me and nothing that's happening now will be important.
I wouldn't call New Year's a fresh start, because we all know it's not but it’s a fresh perspective on everything. Realizing given a little time, most things fade in importance.
As always, stays safe my dears, and have a great New Year’s Eve and fingers crossed your hangovers aren’t too bad.
Love,
The Honest Bitch
xoxo
Saturday, 31 December 2011
Wednesday, 21 December 2011
The Honest Grinch
Let me start by
saying sorry and bear with me over the next week or so in regards to my blogging
schedule. My computer is dying a slow and painful death making blogging a
nightmare.
Plus it is Christmas
which means I’m my mother’s slave labour. She’s a baker which means we’re
always busy this time of year making far too many cookies, cakes and chocolates.
Don’t get me wrong I love
Christmas but I like it on December 1st before all the madness starts.
I put on some Christmas music, dance around like a fool putting up the tree. I’m
normally done all my Christmas shopping by then so I’ll wrap it all up. I love
that part of Christmas....when it’s still fun.
Then around the second week of December I morph into The Honest Grinch. The Christmas music starts driving me crazy. Everyone seems to have me wrapping gifts. Which really pisses me off, since mine is already done.
Then around the second week of December I morph into The Honest Grinch. The Christmas music starts driving me crazy. Everyone seems to have me wrapping gifts. Which really pisses me off, since mine is already done.
Then around the 10th
of December my job as a cookie wench starts. For the next two weeks I shape,
roll, cut and bake around 40 dozen cookies. The oven timer controls my every
movement during this time. As if that isn’t enough I also help make and cover
more chocolates then I care to count. I’m pretty sure everything I own is now
covered in flour, icing sugar and or chocolate.
It’s now December 21st and I’m so over Christmas it isn’t funny. I can’t wait for this all to be over. My back hurts, as much as I love Rockapella their new Christmas album is on my last nerve and if one more person puts a Christmas card through my door I may scream.
It’s now December 21st and I’m so over Christmas it isn’t funny. I can’t wait for this all to be over. My back hurts, as much as I love Rockapella their new Christmas album is on my last nerve and if one more person puts a Christmas card through my door I may scream.
I’m also not what you call child friend. So all these screaming, hyper little kids looking forward to seeing Santa gives me the over whelming urge to shake them like a rag doll and tell them they’ve been horrible, loud mouthed little brats all year and Santa cuts up children like that to power his sleigh.
Yes, I’m aware that
makes me a horrible person, but at least I’m honest about it.
Despite everything, I don’t hate Christmas. I love a lot of the things that go into it. I just can’t stand this much Christmas. I’m suffering from Christmas burnout. And who can blame anyone for that. Stores start putting their Christmas rubbish out before Halloween. Nobody can deal with that much Christmas.
Despite everything, I don’t hate Christmas. I love a lot of the things that go into it. I just can’t stand this much Christmas. I’m suffering from Christmas burnout. And who can blame anyone for that. Stores start putting their Christmas rubbish out before Halloween. Nobody can deal with that much Christmas.
There is a reason advent calendars only have a maximum of 30 days on it. That’s all of the Christmas spirit one person can take. The stores starting that 30 day clock early ensure more and more people hate Christmas. It’s not special or magical when the stupid thing last for 3 months. By the time it actually gets here even kids are bored of it.
Anyways I have to go get some sleep. I have 12 dozen cookies that need baking and 6 Christmas cakes to ice in the morning......Is it over yet?
Love,
The Honest
Grinch..... I mean Bitch
xoxoxo
xoxoxo
Labels:
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Tuesday, 13 December 2011
The Cloud
Before I start my
rant let me give you a little information because a little research goes along
way (Yes, I mean you people commenting on TMZ’s image”. The above picture is of
The Cloud. It HASN’T been built yet. It’s due to start construction in 2013 in
Seoul, South Korea.
Now that you have a
little information let’s start the ranting.
Americans are up in
arms over this design and I can understand why but at the same time I don’t
care if they’re up in arms. Let me explain before you start sharpening your
pitch forks.
It would be one thing
if The Cloud was being built on US soil but it’s not. It’s being built half way
around the world. It’s not exactly rubbing it in anyone’s face; most Americans
will never even see the building. Also keep in mind the drawing for this
building have been floating around Europe for a few months now and nobody made
the connection until the images were released in the states.
I’ll admit when I
first saw the above image I was a little shocked. But who wouldn’t be with TMZ’s
headline “Intentional or unfortunate mistake?” But after I did a little research
about the concept and saw ALL the images available my opinion quickly changed.
I actually really
like the design now. In my opinion architecture is like great art, it should
make you feel something. After all the comments it’s clear this building makes
a lot of people feel a lot of things.
Forgetting the design
for a second. I love the concept behind the building it’s meant to be two
building connected by clouds. On top of “the clouds” is green space which is a
perfect for such a busy city where space is at a premium.
Now back to my rant.
I have an issue with some people’s stance on the cloud tower. And it’s an issue
that spreads further then just this topic. That issue is...The world doesn’t revolve
around America.
Yes, it was a horrible
day in your history, and it effected the people of many nations, you have made it “your history”. It doesn’t bring up the same
emotions in other nationalities as it does in your own. I live in England if I
say 7/7 would you even know what I was talking about? (The day London was
attacked by suicide bomber on public transport)
Different people have
different perspectives. Take the White House for example. American’s fill with
pride when they see it. I’m Canadian when I see it, I think of it on fire in
the war of 1812. Different perspectives and everyone is entitled to their own.
Personally I hope the
architect doesn’t change the design. He designed it with something totally
different in mind. So get over yourself. Your constitution gives you freedom of
speech and ideas. The architect should have the freedom of expressionism. And
you’re free to feel about it however you want and I’m free to rant about the
little things that tick me off. Like the US media choosing the most Twin Town
like image to show. Slow news day?
As always stay safe
and keep your pitch fork sharpened.
Love,
The Honest Bitch
xoxoxo
Monday, 12 December 2011
Girls and Jackasses
Guys seem to always
be asking; ok bitching about how girls seem to go for guys who are assholes. Despite
what my “relationship” with Mr. X may lead you to believe I don’t fall into
that category.
My attraction to him
isn’t based on his jerk like tendencies. I like him because he’s not afraid of
me. If he has something to say he’ll say it. He’ll go toe to toe with me if
need be. I’m a strong personality and I need someone like that to deal with me.
Saying that doesn’t mean
I don’t want a nice guy. I just want a nice guy with a pair of balls. I’m sure
I’m not alone in that.
I’m not sure girls
actually are going for jackasses. I think some of it goes back to the old days
when the guy was the head of the household. It’s not about wanting an ass. It’s
about wanting a leader, someone who is strong, decisive and powerful also known
as “grrr”.
Grrr is a very
important quality, not just bedroom but in a relationship. A female may be
strong and independent but she still wants a guy with some grrr. I mean nobody likes
a doormat.
They say confidence
is sexy. And they’re right. It’s not just confidence about the way you look but
confidence in the things you do. The trick is doing it without becoming a
jackass.
As always stay safe
guys, love,
The Honest Bitch
xoxoxo
xoxoxo
Labels:
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Thursday, 8 December 2011
Wish List
Everyone seems to be
doing their Christmas wish lists. Basically it’s a list of things that want in
an ideal partner. So I thought I’d get in on the act with my own list. Not just
because I have a massive headache and this takes little to no brain power but
because it actually looks like fun.
Let’s start.
Let’s start.
First of all I want a
guy who understands Canada is my home and if I’m going to settle down anywhere
it’s going to be there. In the land of -40 winters and blowing hot summers.
I want a guy who
understands I have loved the Leafs longer than him. And if given the choice I’d
much rather watch the Leafs beat the Habs then have mind blowing sex with him.
I want a guy who
understands I’m a soccer free zone. You can love it all you want but I don’t
want to see or hear it. Soccer can be your dirty little secret.
I want a guy who can
make me laugh. I’m the sort of person who can make a joke out of anything. I
can be mad as hell on minute and then on the floor the laughing the next. Yes,
I am crazy.
I want someone who
understands the importance of alone time. I’m an only child so I’m very use to
being alone and I like it that way. I’m sure that sounds horrible but I don’t
care.
I need a guy who
can put me in my place when I’m being a bitch. I’m a strong personality and
because of that a lot of guys just “yes dear” me and I hate it. I want a guy
who can look at me a say “you’re being a diva, stop!” Not sure I’d listen but
it’s worth a try.
I want a guy who can
do the above without being a dick.
Most importantly I
need a guy who understands my blogging and that it will continue and he may be
written about. He needs to just shut up and take it like a man.
Like most people I
don’t think my list is asking too much. I think it’s just the right amount of
crazy. So come on guys tell me what is on your wish list?
As always stay safe,
Love,
The Honest Bitch
xoxo
P.S Be sure to go check out Jimmy's Low- maintenance girl wishlist
Also check out Joel's wish list so I missed you the first time around
xoxo
P.S Be sure to go check out Jimmy's Low- maintenance girl wishlist
Also check out Joel's wish list so I missed you the first time around
Saturday, 3 December 2011
Stop Knocking Up Chavs
Lately it seems
instead of ending up with nice, sweet, respectable girls all my guys friends
are ending up with the first chav they knock up.
It’s starting to
drive me crazy. Forgetting the fact I have to be nice to these “women”, I just
think almost all of my guy friends can do better and I hate to see them throw
away their life’s over misplaced sperm.
I’m not even sure who
I’m madder at, the women who trap these guys or my guy friends who are falling for this BS.
There are many ways
not to get pregnant, birth control, condoms, vibrator or just keeping your
fucking legs shut. They are all very effective so how all these women are
catching pregnancy like it’s a disease is beyond me.
Then I have my guy
friends who decide since she’s having their baby they have to be with her. Are
you stupid? That’s not the way it works! The only person you are responsible
for is that child.
It always amazes me
how these guys will repeatedly slag off these women and then the second they
find out she’s having a baby they’re magically in love. What a load of shit.
You’re not in love,
you’re in trouble. Feelings don’t magically appear in the snap of a finger. I'm not
sure who’s worse in all of this, the women who aren’t responsible enough to take
birth control or the guys go fall for this BS. Grow a back bone already.
Call me old fashion
but I thought the idea was to fall in love and get married not to fall in sperm
and settle.
Anyway that’s my rant
on the matter. Let me know what you think. As always stay safe.
Love,
The Honest Bitch
xoxo
Labels:
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Thursday, 1 December 2011
Comfort Sex
One of my readers
sent me an article from the Huffington post about comfort sex. He wanted to
know if it was true that women really did this. I could have answered his
question before I read the article; of course women have comfort sex.
I think the article
does a good job of explaining what comfort sex is. It’s not mind blowing sex.
It’s good sex. That pretty much goes the same every time you’re together. There
is nothing life changing or special about it, just solid reliable sex. And the
reason it’s called comfort sex is because it releases endorphins and leaves you
with a warm and safe feeling afterwards.
All women do this whether
they are single or in a relationship. Like chocolate sometimes sex is just what
you need (and it’s a lot better for you then the chocolate.)
Bad day, pissed off, broke
a nail, boss is being a prick or ran into an ex’s new girlfriend are all
reasons we turn to comfort sex. It’s a very quick and effective way of
turning a frown upside down.
Sex has the magic ability
to change our moods and there is nothing wrong with tapping into that power to
uplift our sprits when we’re down. Some people pop pills others have orgasms.
As long as what you’re
doing doesn’t leave you feeling worse in the morning in book it’s all a good thing.
Sometimes we all need the comfort that sex can bring.
Stay safe guys, Love
The Honest Bitch
xoxoxo
xoxoxo
P.S Is there such a
thing as comfort making out?
Sunday, 27 November 2011
Tougher
Seems like everyone
over the past few weeks have been posting statuses about how they’re tougher than
people think they are. I don’t share that problem. Everyone knows how much of a
tough bitch I am.
My problem is because
I’m known for being such a bitch,I’m actually nicer then people think I am. Admittedly
some of that is my own fault because I have selective niceness, so most people
don’t get to see that side of me. But just because you don’t see it doesn’t
mean it’s not there. (God it sounds like I’m talking about Santa Clause.)
When I’m around
friends (I actually like), boyfriends (I’m not planning on dumping) and family
I’m a lot less bitch like. I’m still as honest as ever but I just make sure to
sugar coat it.
I tailor my level of
bitchiness to suit the person I’m dealing with. Some people require more of a
verbal bitch slapping then others. And others need to be spoken to as if they
were a first grade special needs students
People seemed to be
shocked when they hang out with me and I’m just as straight talking as they
thought but I’m nice. It almost confuses them. I may be a bitch but I direct my
bitchiness to where it’s dissevered. Am I the only person who does that?
Anyways I off do the
evening. Have fun and as always stay safe.
Love,
The Honest Bitch
xoxoxo
Labels:
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Thursday, 24 November 2011
Bottled Up
As my name suggests I’m not afraid to speak my mind. However there are some little things I choose to let slide. I like to pick my arguments. Mainly because it’s reduces the risk I’ll end up in jail for murder.
The problem is after a while of bottling up all these little things. I pop.
Mr. X called me a drama queen the other day. I don’t think he understands what is truly going on when I lose it.
It’s not him I’m not reacting to, he’ just the straw the broke the camel’s back. I’m reacting to all the little things that I’ve been letting slide. The idiot who cut me off, an email from an ex’s new girlfriend’s sister (true story), my step dad and then on top of all that you have Mr. X being jerky. It’s only a matter of time before I explode and someone is scraping my exploded brain off the ceiling (pretty picture eh? Lol). There is only so much a girl can take.
I am not a drama queen, I’m a time saver. Instead of reacting to each individual event I pack all my reactions into one firework filled show. Seem logical to me.
Anyway my dears, I’m heading off to do some Christmas shopping (what tools do I need for a lobotomy?). As always stay safe.
Love,
The Honest Bitch
xoxo
The problem is after a while of bottling up all these little things. I pop.
Mr. X called me a drama queen the other day. I don’t think he understands what is truly going on when I lose it.
It’s not him I’m not reacting to, he’ just the straw the broke the camel’s back. I’m reacting to all the little things that I’ve been letting slide. The idiot who cut me off, an email from an ex’s new girlfriend’s sister (true story), my step dad and then on top of all that you have Mr. X being jerky. It’s only a matter of time before I explode and someone is scraping my exploded brain off the ceiling (pretty picture eh? Lol). There is only so much a girl can take.
I am not a drama queen, I’m a time saver. Instead of reacting to each individual event I pack all my reactions into one firework filled show. Seem logical to me.
Anyway my dears, I’m heading off to do some Christmas shopping (what tools do I need for a lobotomy?). As always stay safe.
Love,
The Honest Bitch
xoxo
Saturday, 19 November 2011
Guest Post: An Open Letter From Mr.X
An open letter to The Honest Bitch and her loyal band of bitches,
The Honest Bitch is a curious creature. If you haven’t met her, then that is a shame for you because she is pretty thing with cute complexities and vulnerable virtues. I’ve met her, as you may have read. She has this tendency to rip my clothes off and take advantage of me, something for which I am immensely grateful, since the girl has some skills.
But she gets this magnificent blog to share her soul with the world. I gather some of you want to know about me, the enigmatic Mr X. Why, I have no idea, but allow me to indulge some of you.
I was born in London. It was a difficult birth because my mother was in Manchester at the time. I was raised by a pack of wolves until my youth. I was educated in the dreary school system that taught me that the correct answer is never the facts but what the teacher wants to hear. As a consequence, I managed to get an A in most subjects by writing my name and “How’s about it Miss?” on the front of most exam papers. Strangely, I did poorly in Media Studies. Mr Smith was obviously expecting me to put down actual answers.
Then I went to University in Oxford and instantly fell in love with the city. Sadly, society frowned upon marriage between a man and an urban area, so we had to just stay friends. I came away from my academic studies with a Masters in Wit, Charm and Cynicism. I also picked up a Doctorate in Trust Issues.
I now work as the boss of a shadowy organisation planning on world domination by turning the world’s brains to mush. That’s right; we are behind The X Factor, the Twilight saga and McDonalds.
The Honest Bitch and I met under auspicious circumstances. There I was, randomly spraying myself with two cans of Lynx on a beach, when an armada of women came galloping my way. However, no one was stopping The Honest Bitch, who battered through the crowd with the brutality of an ice hockey player. Little did I realise that she had studied such an art for some time.
So why aren’t we together? Well, I’m a man. Commitment breaks me out in a rash. We could be sex buddies but it would only lead to commitment and we wouldn’t be friends after the ugly break up, done via text message or a restraining order.
Some of you may have questions. Feel free to put them in the comments and those that The Honest Bitch really wants answering, I’m sure she’ll put them to me. The rest will probably end up on her Facebook page in some edited format!
Signing off,
Mr X
The Honest Bitch is a curious creature. If you haven’t met her, then that is a shame for you because she is pretty thing with cute complexities and vulnerable virtues. I’ve met her, as you may have read. She has this tendency to rip my clothes off and take advantage of me, something for which I am immensely grateful, since the girl has some skills.
But she gets this magnificent blog to share her soul with the world. I gather some of you want to know about me, the enigmatic Mr X. Why, I have no idea, but allow me to indulge some of you.
I was born in London. It was a difficult birth because my mother was in Manchester at the time. I was raised by a pack of wolves until my youth. I was educated in the dreary school system that taught me that the correct answer is never the facts but what the teacher wants to hear. As a consequence, I managed to get an A in most subjects by writing my name and “How’s about it Miss?” on the front of most exam papers. Strangely, I did poorly in Media Studies. Mr Smith was obviously expecting me to put down actual answers.
Then I went to University in Oxford and instantly fell in love with the city. Sadly, society frowned upon marriage between a man and an urban area, so we had to just stay friends. I came away from my academic studies with a Masters in Wit, Charm and Cynicism. I also picked up a Doctorate in Trust Issues.
I now work as the boss of a shadowy organisation planning on world domination by turning the world’s brains to mush. That’s right; we are behind The X Factor, the Twilight saga and McDonalds.
The Honest Bitch and I met under auspicious circumstances. There I was, randomly spraying myself with two cans of Lynx on a beach, when an armada of women came galloping my way. However, no one was stopping The Honest Bitch, who battered through the crowd with the brutality of an ice hockey player. Little did I realise that she had studied such an art for some time.
So why aren’t we together? Well, I’m a man. Commitment breaks me out in a rash. We could be sex buddies but it would only lead to commitment and we wouldn’t be friends after the ugly break up, done via text message or a restraining order.
Some of you may have questions. Feel free to put them in the comments and those that The Honest Bitch really wants answering, I’m sure she’ll put them to me. The rest will probably end up on her Facebook page in some edited format!
Signing off,
Mr X
Labels:
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Wednesday, 16 November 2011
C'est La Vie
Its one thing when my
readers question me it’s quite another when Mr. X himself is questioning.
“So you still holding
that hope someday we’ll be together, the happy couple?” – Mr. X
I didn’t actually
answer his question, I just nicely side stepped it and changed the topic as
quickly as possible.
It’s not an easy
question. Feelings don’t evaporate but hope does. I don’t want to say I gave up
because that’s not it. I just accepted I have no control over the matter and
moved on with my life. It sounds cliché but whatever will be, will be. And
whatever feelings I may or may not have are irrelevant.
That being said, I
still have the urge to separate him from his clothing. I’m only human after
all. And damn he’s hot.
As for the “relationship
dream” my attitude is very ces’t la via. It’s not on my radar right now. Even
thought it seems to be on everyone else’s.
All I have to say is
whatever happen or doesn’t happen in the future I just hope he’s happy. Wow, I
actually meant that. Think I’ve been hanging around NTB a little too much. He’s
starting to rub off on me. That's a little scary.....and creepy.
Anyways I have things
I need to get done. e.g my plot to take over the world (You didn't think my nicest would last did you?) . As always stay safe guys.
Love,
The Honest Bitch
xoxo
Labels:
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Saturday, 12 November 2011
No Small Talk
I have a friend who a
while back was talking about how he couldn’t stand small talk. And for once I
actually agreed with him on something. So now 90 percent of the time I just say
or ask what I want without the hassle of making small talk first.
My friends are pretty
use to it now, most of the time. The big issue comes when I talk to someone new
who isn’t use to my straight forwardness. It tends to catch people off guard.
I mean if someone
sent you a message out of the blue that said “where do you hide porn?” how would
you take it?
Personally I’d just
answer the question but not everyone works like that. People have a nasty habit
of getting offending. I’d ask why the question is being asked before
putting the effect in to be offending.
Then again I’m not
the sort of person who is easily offended. I worked customer service for many
years; I developed a pretty thick skin doing that, that and a hatred for most
people.
I think the last
thing that truly offended me was, shock horror Mr. X. We were talking in the back
of his car and he said something about his parents and I replied jokingly “well remind
me keep a ways away if I ever meet them.” To which he snapped “don’t worry you’ll
never met them.” That one got my back up. I actually, come to think of it,
haven’t seen him since he said that to me.
The difference being
I was offended by a statement rather than an open ended question that could be
interpreted many ways. People jump to conclusions when it comes to my random,
out of the blue questions. And personally I think it’s their conclusions that
offend them rather than my questions. But they’ll never admit it.
Anyways my dears, I’m
heading off for the night. As always stay safe.
Love,
The Honest Bitch
xoxo
xoxo
Thursday, 10 November 2011
20 and Counting
“20 kids and
counting, Michelle Duggar is pregnant......Again”
Really!?! Will
someone please tell that women it’s a vagina not a clown car.
Unlike a lot of
people I don’t actually hate the Duggan’s. I don’t agree with them on most
things but I don’t hate them. There isn’t much to hate really, they don’t keep
the money made from their show, they don’t take government handouts and they do
a lot to help others. But I still can’t help but think they’re crazy.
Baby 19 nearly died
and Michelle could have easy died too. Now surely almost dying should be seen
as a message from god that your baby making days are numbered. I understand
that they see babies as a blessing but surely life is also a blessing that
should be cherished and not unnecessarily be put at risk. I mean you have 19
happy, healthy kids; it’s time to quit while you’re ahead.
The only real problem
I have with the Duggar's is the way the older girls pretty much raise all the children. Sure it keeps them out of trouble and teaches them responsibility but
you’re only young once. They’re just setting these kids up for midlife crises later in life.
You never see the older kids out having fun with friends. They’ve pretty much assumed the role of live
in maids. Maybe that’s just the perk to having kids aged 23 years to 23 months
but it just doesn’t seem right to rob these older kids of their childhood and
teenage years.
Who knows maybe all
this 16 and parenting will change these girls minds on birth control. I mean
who in their right mind could live with 20 kids and then decided they want to
pop out 20 of their own.
Anyways my dears
that’s my rant on the matter, what do you guys think? As always stay and play
safe or you may start off your own collection of kids.
Love,
The Honest Bitch
xoxo
Sunday, 6 November 2011
Dream: Switching Off
I had a strange and disturbing
dream last night and because a lot of you share those characteristics (Maxwell)
I thought I’d share the dream with you.
The dream took place
in a long, dark, museum like hallway with offset lighted pedestals lining
either side.
I was on this purple
floating moving platform with Mr. X. He was the museum docent. On each of the
lighted pedestals was a half naked gorgeous guy. As we pulled up to each of
these gorgeous guys Mr. X would talk about them.
“This is Nick, he’s
28 from BC, he plays hockey and is hung like a horse.” Then just as I was starting to drool over the
guy, Mr. X would say something like “Yes, hung horse but he could never measure
up to my personality. Then the light on the pedestal would go black and we’d
move on to the next one.
“This Scott, he’s 29
from New York, he’s the lead singer in an up and coming band.” “He can sing but
he’ll never have my sense of humour.” Then the light would go off.
And this kept going
on and on and on, “this is Jeremy he looks perfect doesn’t he?” “Wrong! He
lacks my ability to tell it how it is.” There were about 50 different guys and
one after another the lights would turn off. Until I just couldn’t take anymore.
I ended up jumping off this moving platform and running for the museum exit
(not easy in the dark).
I ended up waking up
before I manage to find my way out of there. The dream was so weird and disturbing,
I struggled to fall back to sleep after it.
I have no idea what
the meaning behind that dream was and I have a feeling I don’t want to know.
The female mind is a scary place at the best of times. Have any of you ever had
a dream like that?
I’m heading off for
the night and fingers cross this doesn’t become a reoccurring dream. Stay safe
guys.
Love,
The Honest Bitch
xoxo
Wednesday, 2 November 2011
72 Hours Marriage Rant
I don’t normally blog
about celebrity gossip, but this story is on my nerves and ranting is the
only known cure for that. Before I start the ranting let me say allegedly and facts may
or may not be true.... you know those Hollywood types they like to sue when
they get cranky.
Let the ranting begin....
It is one thing to
get divorced after 72 days of marriage but it’s quite another to bullshit to
the media for that length of time, then expect the people you lied to, to have
your back.
The chick has balls I’ll
give her that.
The thing that annoys
me about this story is she’s taking no blame. Her and her pimp (manager) are
just spinning the story and for once the media isn’t buying it. (Well done tabloid
journalists)
How hard is it to
release a statement that says “I fucked up!” Screw this, his parents didn’t like
me, I made no money, I was in love BS and just admit you screwed up. Don’t
continue to lie to the media, which is why the world has turned on you in the
first place.
Her and her family
spinning of this story makes me want to scream. The story started she didn’t want
to move so that’s why it ended. Then it was he wanted fame, then she had
doubts, them his family hates her and that’s why it ended. Give it a week and
she’ll be claiming he hit her or some other BS like that.
Give the world a
break and stop talking. You’re making it worse. It’s clear the media and a lot
of your fans have turned on you that should be your sign that you messed up. So
stop blaming everyone else and admit your screw up.
The next annoying
thing....
“She didn’t make a
dime off her wedding”. Really? Is she the stupidest celebrity on the planet or
just failed first grade math? Anyone who is anyone makes money on their
wedding. They sell pictures, make magazine deals, use someone products. It's common to make money from your wedding when you’re famous so why lie about it.
Most people aren’t stupid, and just because you keep saying it doesn’t make it
true.
I’d also like to add
love doesn’t evaporate, if you actually loved him you still would. You just
wanted the money and the attention from the wedding, you know it, I know it, the
world knows it, so just admit it so the world can move on to whether Justin is a
daddy and if jail orange makes Lindsay look fat.
Stay safe, Love,
The Honest Bitch
xoxo
Sunday, 30 October 2011
Mr. X and NTB
You guys have been
asking about Mr. X and NTB a lot lately so I thought I’d take this chance to
fill you guys in.
Let start with Mr. X.
I’m over it. It’s no secret
we blow hot and cold. Right now it’s my turn to blow cold. I’m not feeling it
right now. The challenge was fun at first but its turn into the challenge that
never ends. And that's about as appealing as an episode of Lamb Chop’s Play along.
I’ve moved on, I’m
crushing on someone new, someone who is a lot less asshole like. Mr. X is an
amazing person don’t get me wrong, I’m just bored of the games and BS.
I think NTB brainwashed
me into hating games. Speaking of NTB nothing happened there. He’s just a busy
bee right now. He’s trying to become a doctor so there just has been very little
time for anyone more fun than a text book.
So in a nutshell I
replaced Mr. X with a cuter, younger model and I’m waiting for NTB to become Dr. NTB,
no great mystery and last time I checked I didn’t murder them....although that
could change.
Anyways my dears as
always stay safe and Happy Halloween.
Love,
The Honest Bitch
xoxo
Labels:
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Wednesday, 26 October 2011
Too Few
I’ve been having this
conversation for many years now and after getting into last night with someone
I even posted it as my question of the day. The question is.
Does a guy who has
only slept with a few people (1 or 2) set off warning flags in your mind?
In my mind it does
set off warning bells. My logic is guys are horn-dogs, and it’s not like they’re
going to say no. So there must be something wrong with him because clearly no
one else wanted to sleep with him.
I mean it’s all in
the math, the average person loses their virginity at 17, so if they’ve only
slept with 2 people by the age of 30 that’s one person every 6.5 years. If you
can only convince someone to sleep with you every half a decade there is
something clearly not right there.
Some people have
brought up the point that maybe the guy has always been in serious relationships and
that’s why his number is so low. I can understand that thinking but then that
sends out a whole different set of warning signs to me and many questions.
Why did the
relationships end after so long? How long does he take to rebound? Is he clingy?
Did he cheat? A women’s mind is a scary place. Also remember you’re talking
about 2 relationships that lasted 4, 5 or 6 years. Or maybe one 10 year relationship
and a rebound shag. It leaves a lot questions that need an answer.
I think it’s only
natural for women to want their man to be more experienced then themselves. I’m
sure it goes back to caveman days. So when they find out the guy they like
is lacking in experience it’s a little unnerving.
Don’t get me wrong by
no means is it a deal breaker. It just makes the female mind start ticking over and
fault finding. If you have nothing to hide and aren't a weirdo you should be
ok....most of the time.
This is just my
opinion on the matter and I’m sure you’ll share yours with me. I’m heading off
for the night. As always stay safe.
Love,
The Honest Bitch
xoxoxo
Love,
The Honest Bitch
xoxoxo
Thursday, 20 October 2011
Double Standard
Why can’t women
express their negative opinions about another woman without sounding like a
catty bitch?
Men can say what they
want about women, hell they can say whatever they want about other men and
nobody bats an eyelash. But the second a women says something negative about
anyone but particularly another women she’s a bitch or jealous or both. And the
more she defends her opinion the worse she sounds.
I’m well aware I’m a
bitch I don’t even try to hind that fact. But I’d like to be able to express an
opinion about another female without people thinking that. I’m sure guys don’t
know this because they’re blinded by the presents of boobs but sometimes females
look a mess and because we don’t get boob blind we see what you don’t. That
doesn’t make us catty, it makes us capable of seeing what is in front of us. It’s
that same ability that lets us look at your penis and question the accuracy of
the ruler you were using.
It always makes me
laugh, guys have no issue listening to female talk about how good looking
another female is. Hell most guys think it‘s hot but the second it turns negative
we’re right back to catty bitch. You don’t see us calling guys catty bitches
when they call another guy a douche bag do you?
It’s such a double
standard and it drives me drives. Why can’t we just be honest about our
opinions and not have to worry about how it’s being taken? I mean everyone has
an opinion and everyone should be free to express it, not just the half of the
population with a penis.
Anyways my dears I’m
heading off for the evening. As always stay safe.
Love,
The Honest Bitch
xoxo
xoxo
Sunday, 16 October 2011
Health Update
A lot of you know
about the ongoing issues that have been plaguing my back. I happen to know a
few of you also suffer with back pain so I thought I’d give you guys an update
to let you know where I am with treatments, doctors and working out with is
actually the causing the pain.
I was receiving
trigger point injections from a pain management centre in attempt to control my
pain levels. They weren't a 100 percent successful but they did have positive
effects. Sadly the NHS decided to close the centre that was handling my
treatment. So I’m kind of in limbo right now. I should have had an injection almost
4 months ago and I’ve heard nothing. Everyone was meant to be referred to a new
specialist or back to their GPs. My GP knows nothing and as of yet no new
doctor.
This whole mess has me
pretty pissed off, and not for the reasons you may think. I’m happy to have
someone new come in with fresh eyes. I’m pissed that nobody seems to know who
has my medical records or where they even are.
I understand finding
the cause will take time, I accept that. But I don’t accept that treating the
pain should take this long. I’m not asking for them to pull a rabbit out of their ass. All I’m asking is for them to control my pain levels. It’s not rocket
science.
The pain itself has an
unwanted side effect, anger.
I’ll be the first to
admit my attitude when my back is bad, sucks. I get snappy, crabby and just
plain mean. And I have no control over it.
The brain can’t
flitter what a person is saying when it’s too busy scream “THAT HURTS!”
I have no patience to
deal with anyone or thing when it’s at its worse. I know this so I’ll pull away
from people. You won’t see me on any chat thing or around people. I just stay
away from everyone. It makes things easier. A little lonely at times but it’s
better that way. Trust me.
I hate going to see
my doctor for my back. I know there is nothing he can really do for me. It’s the
specialists that needs to sort it. So I feel guilty taking up an
appointment slot.
I had the decision
taken away from me last week. My moods were horrible because of the amount of
pain I was in so I was forced to go the doctors. I had no say what so ever in
that decision.
After talking things
over with him and him seeing how bad I really was. He decided to refer me back
to the spinal specialist (because that worked out so well the first time) and
try me on some different medications. He added a muscle relaxant to my long
list of pills and stronger painkillers.
Here’s a tip never
Google what your doctor gives you. My pain killers.....also given to heroin
addicts. That’s something everyone wants to read about their new medication.
Admittedly the new
pills do seem to be helping a lot but still not big on having something in
common with a heroin addict. I also don’t love the warning to athletes on the
box saying “these pills may cause you to fail anti-doping tests”. Damn it,
there go my Olympic dreams. (Sex and bitching are Olympic sports right?)
Before I go I want to
share with you guys some of the tips my chiropractor gave me for dealing with the
pain. He may have been expensive £30 for 15 minutes well 10 minutes once you
get changed but he knows his stuff.
The first tip he gave
me was to use damp heat. The easiest way to do that is to put a wheat bottle in
the microwave with a glass of water. Sounds simple but it’s very effective.
The second tip isn’t
really a tip. It’s a product. BioFreeze! I could kiss my chiropractor for that
one, and he’s one ugly dude. When my back is bad, this stuff is my best friend.
It’s magic in a tube. Easily the best working product on the market. The
other thing I love about it is the smell fades really quickly so I don’t have
to worry about smelling like an old lady all day. Oh how I love BioFreeze.
Before you ask no,
I’m not being paid to say that.
Anyways my dears
that’s all from me. Hope you are all well and have a great night. As always stay safe.
Love,
Love,
The Honest Bitch
xoxo
xoxo
Labels:
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Tuesday, 11 October 2011
Twitter Stalker
I was
having a conversation the other day with this Internet random. Ok, at this
point he isn’t so random but he’s still a relative stranger. We were on Twitter
chatting about film and TV mostly when I heard my phone go off. I looked down
to see who it was and to my shock and horror I saw it was a text from a ghost
of boyfriends past.
This is
never a good thing. I do my very best to make sure when I’m finished with a guy
he never wants to see or speak to me again. So when I see an ex’s name pop-up I know I’m
in trouble.
I looked at the message to see what the asshole was contracting me for. I was thinking law suit,
warning me of the hit man he hired or maybe he was pregnant. I was a little relieved
when all it said was “who’s the new man in your life?”
I was
relieved but also confused. I’m single, so the only thing with a penis in my life
is buzzy the rampant rabbit. So I replied back with just a question mark. He
wasn’t worth risking chipping my nail polish over.
He quickly
replied back with the name of the Internet random. This meant one of two things,
he’s either friends with said random (which is unlikely because he has no
friends) or he’s stalking my Twitter feed. Don’t you just love the digital age?
This, my
dear friends, is why they call me a bitch, I simply replied with “Oh, he’s not
new. He’s the guy I was imagining you were when we were sleeping together.”
Personally
I thought it was funny, he on the other hand....always had a bad sense of humor.
What did he
expect? He contacts me after 3 years and wants to know about my love life. Did
he think I’d welcome him with open arms? Not a chance. I took the opportunity
to teach the little bastard a lesson.... maybe he’ll think twice before he puts
his nose in my business again.
I don’t
believe in staying friends with ex’s. People breakup because they can no longer
stand to be around the other person, staying friends is basically just removing
the sex from the relationship. When did taking the sex out of anything make it
better?
See my
point? It’s kind of crazy when you think about it.
Anyways,
that’s my rant on the matter. Have a great night and as always stay safe.
Love,
Love,
The Honest
Bitch
xoxo
xoxo
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