Showing posts with label Contact. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Contact. Show all posts

Tuesday 11 October 2011

Twitter Stalker

I was having a conversation the other day with this Internet random. Ok, at this point he isn’t so random but he’s still a relative stranger. We were on Twitter chatting about film and TV mostly when I heard my phone go off. I looked down to see who it was and to my shock and horror I saw it was a text from a ghost of boyfriends past.

This is never a good thing. I do my very best to make sure when I’m finished with a guy he never wants to see or speak to me again.  So when I see an ex’s name pop-up I know I’m in trouble.

I looked at the message to see what the asshole was contracting me for. I was thinking law suit, warning me of the hit man he hired or maybe he was pregnant. I was a little relieved when all it said was “who’s the new man in your life?”

I was relieved but also confused. I’m single, so the only thing with a penis in my life is buzzy the rampant rabbit. So I replied back with just a question mark. He wasn’t worth risking chipping my nail polish over.

He quickly replied back with the name of the Internet random. This meant one of two things, he’s either friends with said random (which is unlikely because he has no friends) or he’s stalking my Twitter feed. Don’t you just love the digital age?

This, my dear friends, is why they call me a bitch, I simply replied with “Oh, he’s not new. He’s the guy I was imagining you were when we were sleeping together.”

Personally I thought it was funny, he on the other hand....always had a bad sense of humor.

What did he expect? He contacts me after 3 years and wants to know about my love life. Did he think I’d welcome him with open arms? Not a chance. I took the opportunity to teach the little bastard a lesson.... maybe he’ll think twice before he puts his nose in my business again.

I don’t believe in staying friends with ex’s. People breakup because they can no longer stand to be around the other person, staying friends is basically just removing the sex from the relationship. When did taking the sex out of anything make it better?

See my point? It’s kind of crazy when you think about it.

Anyways, that’s my rant on the matter. Have a great night and as always stay safe.

Love,

The Honest Bitch
xoxo

Wednesday 27 July 2011

Sorry

I just wanted to say sorry to you guys. I’ve been a bad blogger over the past few weeks. Hopefully by this weekend I’ll be back to normal and back to keeping you guys entertained and laughing.

Because some of you have been asking the problem was the doctor changed my pain medication and I neglected to read the enclosed leaflet. I’ve come to find out anyone taking the pill also needs to take a multivitamin because it blocks certain vitamins. After a couple months of not getting those vitamins I’ve been feeling ill, tired and ran down.

I’m hoping by this weekend I’ll be feeling better and be able to return to my normal posting schedule. Which is one weekday post (Mon-Thurs), and one weekend post (Fri-Sun).

I also do a post every Monday for Logic Haze (http://logichaze.com/type/article/thehonbit) I’m looking at bring back “The Honest Bitch Helps” for that weekly post. It’s a lot of fun for me to write and you guys seem to enjoy it. So if you have any questions about relationships, sex, life, or whatever you’d like me to answer is my unique way send them to Ms.HonestB@gmail.com It’s all in fun and maybe it’ll help someone and ….upset a few guys :-)

Also keep your eyes open for my guest post on http://almostlastmanstanding.com/ and he’ll also being doing a guest post for here so that should be worth a read, he's a talented and funny writer. I’d tell you guys to be nice but that’s not your style I know. So I'll just tell you to be honest and have fun with him.

I’m looking look forward to getting back in to the swing of things and back to having some fun with you guys. How I’ve missed your evilness.

Love you guys,

The Honest Bitch

xoxoxoxo

Wednesday 13 July 2011

The Law Is The Law

There has been something making its rounds on Facebook…again and instead of ranting on one friend’s status I thought I’d just rant here instead to a wider less argumentative audience.

TO NON-PET OWNERS who visit my home. Don't complain about my pets. (1) They live here, you don't. (2) If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. That's why they call it 'Fur'nitur e. (3) Chances are, I love my pets more than I like you. (4) To you, they are animals. To me, they are family who are hairy, walk on all fours & don't talk back. Re-post if you love your pets!

Speaking as a non-pet owner, all the above it’s perfectly fine. There is no problem with furry furniture or you loving you animal more than me because odds are I’m not your biggest fan either. The problem comes when your stupid fucking pets jump on and lick me and you just stand there doing nothing looking like it’s the cutest thing in the world.

It’s not cute. It’s gross and really unhygienic.

It’s not that I hate pets. I grow up having dogs and cats. But mine were well trained and knew who the boss was.

If people want to pretend their pets are human, that’s perfectly fine by me. However if that’s the case I was to see those furry little bastards in a pair of teeny tiny paw-cuffs.

If a human were to act in the same manor, jumping on and licking me, without hesitation I’d have that person arrested. It’s a criminal act and I’d expect the perpetrator to be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. If the offender happens to be four legged and have a cold nose so be it. I want to see the little bastard behind bars and in a bright orange jumpsuit. No means no and not speaking English is no excuse for breaking the law.

If you want to pretend your pet in human, that’s fine. I’ll play along but I want to see that them follow the same laws as any other human. After all fair is fair :-)

Stay safe guys, Love,

The Honest Bitch

xoxoxo

Wednesday 4 May 2011

Post-It Communication

I recently had a following out with someone because of lack of communication or miss communicate I think is a better way to put it.

He felt I didn’t share my feelings with him; instead I turned to my blog. I don’t share that opinion. I feel I did tell him how I felt but he just didn’t hear it. This has left me thinking would the world be a better place if we communicated via post-it notes?

I’ll admit I didn’t tell him in the most straight forward way. Females rarely do. I like to throw things like that into the middle of email or just into a casual conversation. I don’t want to show weakness and if I can bury it in a message, I will. It makes me feel less of a failure. I still have said it. I’ve just didn’t said it with arrows pointing to it. Looking back it would have been easier to stick a post-it to forehead saying “I feel neglected”.

Just think about how many less fights there would be if you could just make your point via post-it notes. There would be no saying “you didn’t tell me” or “I didn’t know”. I mean if it’s stuck to their body nobody can play dumb. How easy would breakups be? “We’re over, you’re a cheat, Take your stuff”. No tears, no guilt, just stick it and leave.

I may take to leaving post-it style messages. I just like the idea of ditching the bullshit and being straight forward. Not sure if that will keep me out of trouble or land me in more. Who cares, I’m always in trouble for something. Can’t please everyone or in my case anyone.

Anyways I’m heading off guys. Stay safe.

Love

The Honest Bitch

xoxoxoxoxo

Tuesday 11 January 2011

Contact The Honest Bitch

I had someone on twitter ask if I had any other connect information. I have posted it on twitter before but that was about 500 followers ago. So I thought I'd post it on here.

Twitter
http://twitter.com/TheHonestBitch

Facebook
http://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Honest-Bitch/117526898310132

Email
ms.honestb@gmail.com

Love you guys

The Honest Bitch

xoxoxoxoxoxo