Friday, 28 October 2016

The Mr. X Relationship

I always get a lot of questions about Mr. X and my relationship, and I get it, we have a weird fucking relationship. I’d be curious too. A lot of you were here and went through it all with me and to think I’d still have anything to do with him boggles your minds. I completely understand and if I were in your shoes…. I’d question my sanity too.

I can categorically say, if he ever actually had the title of boyfriend, we wouldn’t be having this conversation. He'd be dead to me, no second changes, or thirds. He’d be dead. He’s survived all this time on a technicality.

Because our whole relationship has existed in this grey area, I’ve been able to tell myself the feeling I felt were unjust. I had no right to feel that way. I’m a perfectly sane, crazy person so I know the above to be untrue and I have every right to feel whatever I felt. However, it allowed to get to a place where I could try and understand the other side and forgive and more importantly grow.

Over the years, I’ve become incredibly grateful to Mr. X for the growth. I know without a doubt; I wouldn’t be me if it wasn’t for the saga that was him. Don’t get me wrong, life isn’t perfect. But I’d be married to the wrong man, living a life I didn’t want, if it wasn’t for him. In a really fucked up way he saved me. I was headed down the wrong path, one I knew was wrong for me, but didn’t have the strength to end it. Surviving him gave me that strength.

Maybe it’s Stockholm syndrome, but I will always have a soft spot for Mr. X and for whatever reason he’ll probably always have an interest in me. I’m not sure what his reasons are, I stopped trying to figure out his motives years ago. But it’s almost like he has feeling, I suspect it’s a software glitch.

I hope this answered some of your questions, and hopefully didn’t raise too many more. My simple summation is, he’s a friend, that shouldn’t be a friend, that is a friend.

Anyways, I am going to go, I have a sexy man I have to message back, look forward to those details in my next post. But, before I go I have this question for you, do you have any friends, that shouldn’t be friends, that are friends? Let me know your stories in the comment box below. And as always, stay and play safe.


The Honest Bitch 

Friday, 21 October 2016


“If Mr. X can find someone you shouldn’t have any problems.” That might be my favourite line I’ve heard all year.

I want to straighten something out with the universe; I am not single because I cannot find anyone. I am single because I rather be alone, I happen to enjoy my own company and other people are kind of assholes. It seems like a no brainer to me.

I’m aware that sounds horrible but, I spend a minimum of 48 hours a week dealing with whiny cry baby men at work, and rightly or wrongly just the thought of having to deal with one at home makes me want to take up serial killing.

“You’ll change your tone when you meet the right man”, I hear you and maybe your right, but I have no will to try and locate this magic man, or even hearing him out if he happens upon me. I think at this point he’d have to tase me and tie me to a chair for me to take notice.

Maybe this is a sign I need a new job, or maybe that Mr. X did change me or maybe I’m just grumpy and getting old, who knows. But right now I’m choosing to embrace my grumpy singledom.

Anyways, you gorgeous people, I am going to go and enjoy the rest of the day before I go back to work tomorrow, but before I do I have this question for you; why is being single looked down on? Let me know your thoughts in the comment box below. And as always, stay and play safe. 


The Honest Bitch 

Friday, 14 October 2016


During a recent trip to Manchester to visit a work friend, I got quizzed on why I wouldn’t give out my URL. I was asked why if I want my blog to get hits and grow, why I don’t tell everyone. Since I get this type of question a fair bit, I thought I’d address it here.

The oversimplified answer is; I protect my URL for an easy life. I use to, many moons ago, share it freely and it resulted in more drama than one person should have to deal with. So when I moved my blog here, I decided I needed to protect myself from that. It hasn’t worked completely; I’ve been threatened with a few lawsuits, but that’s all the more reason to limit the possible damage. I’m not shy about what I do, I just need a little bit of a wall.

The less simple answer is; my blog isn’t about me…. Let me try and explain without sounding like a crazy(er) person. When you watch a vlog your opinion is swayed before anything is even said. We’re all shallow to some level. By keeping my anonymity, this place becomes about my stories, experiences and opinions and not about me per se. It allows us to connect on the experiences and opinions rather than on who we are.

I hope that makes sense and if not I’ll blame it on still being a little rusty and whole lot crazy. Before I go I’m going to leave you with this question; what question do you always get from your friends? Let me know in the comment box below. And as always, stay and play safe.


The Honest Bitch

Monday, 10 October 2016

Happy Thanksgiving

I just what to take a moment to wish you all a very Happy Thanksgiving, from my family to yours. I Hope you a wonderful day surrounded by family and friends

Love you all,

The Honest Bitch 

Friday, 7 October 2016

Emotionally Out of Whack

I’ve often said I blog to keep myself sane, and I think the past few months may have proven that fact. Admittedly, my back has been playing up which hasn’t made things any easier, but even bearing that in mind, I’ve been incredibly snappy and bitchy and oh so close to murderous lately.

I was so dumb, I didn’t even put two and two together until I started contemplating quitting my blog. I was lying in bed thinking about all the reason I blog and what I enjoy about it and if there’s been about I’ve been missing and it just slapped me in the face.

I have been missing this release, and without having this safe place to conduct these somewhat controlled releases I’ve just been snapping and going at people with little provocation.

I may be a self-proclaimed bitch, but that isn’t me. I tend to have decent self-control and an impressive ability to bite my tongue, a skill I mastered thanks to my many years of customer service work. Snapping like I have been doing, has been a little scary. It’s felt like it’s only a matter of time before I do something I may regret.

I’m hoping my return to blogging will help balance things out and hopefully make me a little more tolerable. Because I’m starting to piss even myself off. Which is almost impressive when you think about it.

Anyways, you sexy beasts, I am going to go and grab a shower and try and get through the day without hitting anyone, but before I do I will leave you with this question. What do you do to keep you your emotions in whack? Let me know in the comment box below. And as always, stay and play safe.


The Honest Bitch

Saturday, 1 October 2016

Happy October Strangers

Happy October! I guess I should start by addressing the naked ghost in the room, where have I been for the past 5 months?

And I wish I had a more exciting answer for you’ll. I’ve just been an uninspired, lazy blogger, and rather than just push through I haven’t been writing. And that hasn’t been limited to my blog. I haven’t done any stories, or script work. I haven’t even been making the effort to go to improv. I’ve just been checked out.

So why am I back? Good question. I have recently had a lot of my blogger friends call it quits and it made me question my own blog mortality. And, after a lot of thoughtI’m not ready to die.

Coming to the above conclusion, I also came to the realization that if I'm not ready for the blog to die, I better write or it’s as good as gone anyways.  So here I am, back and rusty as hell.

I’m jumping right back into my Friday schedule, I know today is Saturday, but my weird brain just liked the sound of the starting on the 1st rather than the 30th better. Just like when I was actually writing before, I will be pre-writing most my post just to make sure you guys have content on the Friday.

I just want to thank you guys in advance for bearing with me while I try and shake off the rust. And thank you for still being here, I’m can honestly say I don’t think I would be if I was a reader but, that’s why you guys are awesome. Thank you guys, and as always, stay and play safe.


The Honest Bitch