Returning To Normality

I am a big believer in faking it until you make it and thanks to that technique I’m finally starting to feel like myself again. With a little effort to do what I “should do”, I’m finally starting to feel how I wish to.

A lot of it down to little things; like making myself shower, making sure I do some skin care, putting a bit of makeup on, going to improv class, forcing myself to smile. Not things I feel like doing, but all things I’d normally do.

The other part that helped was I was out of my routine at work; I was based at a different depot for most of September. I was working with my old trainee, which was well timed for both of us. We balance each other out well. I help him see the funny side of things, so he doesn’t get stressed and he acts as a sounding board for me, so I can remove my emotions from the equation and allow my logic to take over. We’ve always been a good team, and that was more than helpful in turning things around.

Team work helps, and my normal site doesn’t allow for that as we work on own  own. I do have some amazing colleagues at the end of the phone which is useful but not the same. Plus, their usefulness depends on their mood and one shitty mood can be contagious. Steve being the example of that; most of last month he had a stick firmly up his ass and it wasn’t just me that noticed it, everyone who spoke to him seemed to catch part of his mood, and it was just unpleasant for all.

Anyways, I am going to go and enjoy the remainder of my day off. I won’t leave you with a question of the blog but leave me yours in the comments below as I’m finally getting around to the Q&A I promised. As always my dears, stay and play safe.

Love,

The Honest Bitch

xoxo

Emotionally Out of Whack

I’ve often said I blog to keep myself sane, and I think the past few months may have proven that fact. Admittedly, my back has been playing up which hasn’t made things any easier, but even bearing that in mind, I’ve been incredibly snappy and bitchy and oh so close to murderous lately.

I was so dumb, I didn’t even put two and two together until I started contemplating quitting my blog. I was lying in bed thinking about all the reason I blog and what I enjoy about it and if there’s been about I’ve been missing and it just slapped me in the face.

I have been missing this release, and without having this safe place to conduct these somewhat controlled releases I’ve just been snapping and going at people with little provocation.

I may be a self-proclaimed bitch, but that isn’t me. I tend to have decent self-control and an impressive ability to bite my tongue, a skill I mastered thanks to my many years of customer service work. Snapping like I have been doing, has been a little scary. It’s felt like it’s only a matter of time before I do something I may regret.

I’m hoping my return to blogging will help balance things out and hopefully make me a little more tolerable. Because I’m starting to piss even myself off. Which is almost impressive when you think about it.

Anyways, you sexy beasts, I am going to go and grab a shower and try and get through the day without hitting anyone, but before I do I will leave you with this question. What do you do to keep you your emotions in whack? Let me know in the comment box below. And as always, stay and play safe.

Love,

The Honest Bitch

xoxo 

Let's Be Positive

Like I said in my last post, I’ve been tasked with the goal of being more positive this year and in an attempt to make a little headway with this goal I’ve been doing some research.

Let me start by saying there is a lot of utter bullshit out there on the matter. I don’t know whose writing this shit, but they clearly never spent one minute in the real world. “Eliminate all negativity from your life” …. Ok, so I’ll quit my job and never leave the house again. Let’s be honest, most the advice on the matter is highly unrealistic and impractical and because it’s unrealistic and impractical it’s never going to work.

That said, I did manage to find few none crackpot ideas that I’m willing to try.

The most interesting being the idea of “Two Steps Forward”.  The idea is when you find yourself judging others, or focusing the negative, or complaining; you counter it with 2 positive thoughts or gratitudes.

So for example; when I find myself thinking my day shift are a bunch of brain dead wankers. I can counter that with, I’m grateful I have a job and I’m surrounded by lovely, hardworking, helpful individuals on nights.

There was also the controlled breathing technique I’ve been meaning to try for about 28 years. It’s said those who can control their breathing can control their life, I kind of think this is hokum, but I’m willing to give it a try.

The third and final thing technique I’m going to try is setting attainable goals. I’m not sure this one is going to work for me. I’m not very goal orientated, I’m more of a fear of failure orientated person, but I will try setting a small goal every day and seeing what effect it has on me.

I’m probably not going to try and implement all these at once, but over the next few months I will give each and every one of these a fair shot and add and subtract as necessary. I’ve heard small changes are more likely to stick anyways, so we’ll see.

And if none of this works I shall take a few more acting classes and play a character during working hours. It’s always good to have a plan B right?

Anyways, you lovely people I’m going to go and get some sleep, but before I do I have this question for you; what do you do to be less negative?  Let me know your thoughts in the comments below. And, as always, stay and play safe.

Love,

The Honest Bitch 

xoxo

Little Things

It’s amazing how the little things can change your whole mood and it’s amazing how this point has been demonstrated to me twice this week with the same issue.

I was venting to my Enigma writing partner (we really need to bring that back) Joel about the whole being lied to thing despite our conversation I just couldn’t shake the rage, I was in an absolutely foul mood.

It was getting late, so before I went to bed, like I do every night, I hopped on the computer to check my blog, and that’s when my bad mood instantly lifted. I spotted that my view were way up. And any blogger will tell you, you just can’t be in a bad mood when your views are up. Plus the more people who are reading my blog, the more people who are finding out he’s a tool so it’s kind of a win, win for me.

Then last night my 2^nd Facebook account asked me if I knew the guy that blocked me and it sent me into a rage. Once again. It’s the whole being lied to thing I find infuriating. I was doing so well at acting like I didn’t care, but that pushed me over the edge and psycho bitch came out to play for a while.

Then out of the blue I got an email telling me my .com was available. So despite it being incredibly late, I set it all up. Once it all went live the excitement completely wiped out my angry. I mean thehonestbitch.com is a thing now, how can I be angry?

It’s silly, I know, the dot com doesn’t change anything but it somehow makes me feel more legitimate. I’ve been blogging nearly half my life and I’ve been blogging here for 5 years. And I’ve been given some great opportunities because of it and I’ve been incredibly blessed to have the support of so many wonderful people, but yet that dot com is the thing that has made me feel like a true blogger and not just some fake. Like I said, it’s silly, I know.

Which brings me back nicely to how something so minor can have such a huge impact on your mood. I’ve been in a fantastic mood all day, don’t get me wrong, I’m still irritated, but in the grand scheme of things it’s nothing.

Anyways, my dears, I am off to celebrate thehonestbitch.com being a real thing. If that’s not a good reason to a have drink, I don’t know what is. But before I go I shall leave you with this question; what little thing changes your mood? Let me know in the comment box below and as always, stay and play safe.

Love,

The Honest Bitch

xoxoxo