Wednesday, 30 March 2011

Setting The Record Straight

I’ve been asked the same question a lot lately, I have answered most of them individually but since I’ve been asked so many time I thought I’d just set the record straight in a little blog.

You guys always make me laugh and you have been very opinionated on this matter so let me just tell you guys straight, I am not nor do I wish to be fucking Neal.

Let’s start with the main issue and there are a few with your ideas. His penis isn’t 3,000 kilometers long. I’ve never seen it but I assume a penis that size would be in Guinness or something.

The other problem is I don’t date or sleep with guys that are younger then I am. It’s just one of my little quirks. I’m sure there are lots of great guys younger than me but I just find it off putting. They have to be older and they have to be taller that is the law.

I’ve loved reading your opinions and thoughts on this “relationship”. They have made me laugh. My favorite ones are the ones where you call him the devil and tell me Mr. X is my soul mate. I love you guys but you’re crazy.

Please don’t get me wrong, Neal is an amazing guy and I care for him but he isn’t the future Mr. Honest Bitch. For one minute forget about him being young and his penis not spanned the Atlantic but the honest truth is I don’t begin to meet his standards either. We’re both pretty set in stone about what we want. But feel free to keep sending me your ideas and opinions because they never fail to put a smile on my face.

I love you guys,

The Honest Bitch


PS Stay safe

Friday, 25 March 2011

Rough Week

Hey Guys,

I’ve had a rough week and it’s kind of turned me into an evil bitch and I feel bad about it. Well kind of bad about it, my points were valid but I didn’t say it in the most lady-like way. It was more of the drunken sailor way of getting a point across.

I’ll try to explain why I’ve been so snappy. The reason is very simple. My back has been really bad. It sounds like nothing I know until you realise the effect it has on your normal life.

It’s a well known fact when you’ve been coping with long term pain some of it can just be in your mind, so to combat that I don’t listen to my body and I just carry on as normal until I literally end up on the ground. This is a stupid thing to do in all honestly and a major reason why my mood takes a knock.

When my back is at it worse, my normal life stops. I don’t go out, I don’t see friends, and I don’t chat much via text or online. I just lock myself away in my room and sleep a lot and do not much else. Locking myself away is good thing because when I’m in pain, I can’t play nice. My brain is busy thinking “pain, pain, pain” and it has no room to yell at me and say “reword that”.

I cope with my normal pain levels by having fun and just not taking things too seriously. This method fails when my pain level reaches level 8. At that point my sense of humour flees my body and I become evil and not much fun.

Luckily I’m feeling much better now and more like myself. I need to thanks Neal for sticking around. I won’t blame anyone for running away and hiding under their bed. Hell I think I would hide too.

Anyways my dears have a great weekend and as always stay safe.


The Honest Bitch

Saturday, 19 March 2011

Internet Friends

When I say internet friends I’m not talking about those “friends” you have online to stretch an itch. I’m talking about those few friends you’ve met online, who live on the opposite sides of the world and you continue to chat to because you like each other and have things in common. Those few special randoms you just click with.

I almost feel that the friendships you form online are more pure. You’re not influenced by who they hang out with, who they’re dating or having to be seen in public with them. These friendships are formed and last because you can be completely honest with one and other. You don’t have to pretend to be something you’re not and you don’t have to worry about maintaining a certain reputation. You’re just you.

It’s kind of weird when you think about it, you form these close friendships with people you probably wouldn’t recognize in the street. Neal is the perfect example, I felt horrible that I hurt his feelings and I may or may not have cried about it. Anyone who knows me wouldn’t believe that for second. I've never been sorry for anything I’ve said. After all it’s only my personal opinion. So the idea that I could feel bad over a relative stranger is crazy. Then again I’ve never been normal.

The other big benefit to having good internet friends is they don’t know you’re real life friends. This means you can vent, moan and bitch all you want without fear that the person will find out. Internet friends are also great for unbiased opinions. They have no motivation to lead you astray.

The other great benefit is if things turn sour Internet friends are easy to get rid of. Block button, appear offline then are so many ways to get rid of them. You hope it never comes down to that, but if they go crazy they’re easier to hide from than real world friends.

Internet friends have an important role to play in the circle of life. Anyways guys I’m off have a great night and as always stay safe.


The Honest Bitch

Tuesday, 15 March 2011

Damned if I do and damned if I don’t

I slept maybe an hour last night someone was hurt by something I said, actually more by the way in which it was said or not said as the case may be. I truly felt like I was living in damned if I do and damned if I don’t land.

Things weren’t said because my dear friend Neal is a very busy man. I know he is the sort of person who will make time to talk but I just don’t feel important enough to take up his time. He has a lot on his plate and I feel bad adding to that.

I’m damned if I do fill him in on the little thing because I feel like I should let him get on with what he needs to do. I feel bad for needed to chat to him. And I’m damned if I don’t tell him anything because it looks bad, and he ends up hurt and pissed off.

I just can’t catch a break. I’ve been single of almost a year and I’m still getting in trouble with men. The sad thing in this case I don’t even get makeup sex. Hell I don’t even get a makeup hug :-)

We managed to talk things out last night and we’re fine but I’m not fine with myself. Stupid decisions and I should have handle things differently. I’ll always be my harshest critic. My biggest strength and weakness is I’ll replay things over and over until I’ve learned all I can. Great way to learn but I like my sleep. Luckily I rarely make the same mistake to twice.

I do feel really bad that my words hurt someone I care about. Yeah, it was the way I felt at the time but I didn’t mean it to sound as mean as it may have come across. I should have taken a moment to see it through his eyes and I didn’t. I am sorry for that.

Anyways my dears, I have things I need to get back to. Stay safe guys and remember to think before you type.

Love Always

The Honest Bitch

Sunday, 13 March 2011

Speaking My Mind

Last week Neal said something to me about venting and if I have a problem with it he has messages with me venting. He may have been joking but my first thought was good ahead girlfriend.

I vent to stop me saying things to people I’ve already said to them. It stops me becoming a broken record. I may be a bitch not I’m not sneaky. If I have something to say I’ll say it. I’m not afraid to speak my mind.

My rants are talked about years after the fact. Besides changing men on a weekly basics, I’m known for my rants and if you think I’d waste my “A” material on a someone who is as good as imaginary, you’re crazy.

I love Neal dearly, he’s a great guy but he’s not getting my “A” material unless I ever feel the need to get pissed off with him. Which is unlikely, we just snap at each other and I ended up in tears. It’s never got to the point when I’ve needed to sling comments at him. Plus I wouldn’t want to; my blogs reaches 500 people less than his videos. Life lesson – Never fuck with people that are more powerful then you.

I understand the importance of playing nice. You can’t speak to everyone in the same way. Some people need things wrapped up in a positive bow and others you can tell them straight. I’d rather tell people straight, I don’t like to play nice but I can do it unlike some people I know. That why I like Mr. X he has the inability to play nice and I love that. You don’t have to read in-between the lines with him, he’ll tell you how it is with no regard for human feelings.

Anyways dolls I have things to do, I’ll speak to you all soon. As always stay safe.


The Honest Bitch

Thursday, 10 March 2011

People Person

I’ve worked a lot of customer facing roles over the years and sadly I’m rather good at them. I say sadly because as everyone who’s ever been at their job knows when your good you end up working more. You’re talked into more hours, you’re the first one called when someone is sick, you’re always being called upon to trouble shoot and most annoyingly you’re made to train new staff members. I may be good at what I do but there is a small problem...I’m not a people person.

When I worked customer service roles I use to think of it as a part in play. That’s why I was so good at my job; I don’t have a gift for dealing with people, I’m just a fantastic actress.

I can’t stand 99% of people. The list of reasons why I can’t stand some people is pretty much never ending. It could be something as small as a voice that goes through me or as big as fucking their way through all of my friends. I have more reasons to hate someone then I do to like them. I’m sorry if that sounds a little bitchy but that’s just me.

A larger percent of people are complete idiots and seeing as I have a low bullshit tolerance I was doomed from the start. I can’t tell you have many times someone’s been talking to me and it’s taken all my will power not to strangle them. My advice to the world is, if you don’t know what you’re talking about shut the fuck up or someone with less will power then me will hurt you.

For those people I actually do like, they should feel honoured. I don’t like many people. Hell there is large amount of my friends I don’t like. The big testament to that is my Facebook friends list, it's 700+, however the amount of people who can see me online to chat is 5 (soon to be 4, someone have truly fucked me off). Like I said....I’m not a people person.

I’m just not someone that needs to be around people to be happy. I’m an only child so I’m very use to my own company and for me to want someone else around they have to be something special and most people aren't.

Anyways my dolls I’m heading off for the night. As always stay safe.

Love always

The Honest Bitch

Friday, 4 March 2011


For as long as I can remember I’ve always had exceptional perception skills. I tend to pick up on things that others wouldn’t. I also have a habit of picking up on thing before the person themselves realize how they’re feeling. My perception skill are so good it’s often been suggested that I’m an empath. I don’t buy into that. I just listen to people and take notice when things, no matter how minor, change about them.

When you pick up on people’s emotions sometimes you see warning signs in people’s behaviour. This is all well and good if the person knows how they’re feeling but people like to deny their feelings and when I can see there is a problem or they're heading for one this can be a challenge.

I don’t want to see any of my friends hurt or overwhelmed and when I see these little warning signs I want to help and prevent it. I only have good intensions but because people sometimes can’t see what I see or are deny it they can take offence to anything I have to say.

I can’t begin to tell you how much it pisses me off when people snap at me because they just don’t want to admit they’re overwhelmed. When I get my kindness thrown back at me part of me just thinks “Fuck it, let them crash and burn”. It really gets to me when I trying to help someone and in returned I get bitched at. It’s not my fault you’re having problems, so why take it out on me?

Don’t get me wrong I’m always there if a friend needs to talk or just vent but I won’t be blamed or yelled at for things at have nothing to do with me. I’m happy to help and good the extra mile for my friends but sometimes I wonder why I bother. I mean there is no one there for me when I have a bad day. It just grates on me sometimes that the give and take in my friendships isn’t anywhere close to being even.

It’s not helping matters that my patience is almost nonexistent at the moment. My back pain has reappeared. I’ve gone from being nearly pain free for 3 months to being in 24 hours of consistent pain. Back pain is nothing new to me, but when it goes from nothing to consistent it just takes a while for my body to stop crying about it and just deal with it. So I think I may be a little touchier then normal too which isn’t a great thing.

Anyways my dears I’m heading off to watch the game. Have a good night and as always stay safe.

Love Always

The Honest Bitch