Showing posts with label Life Lesson. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Life Lesson. Show all posts

Friday 28 November 2014

A Repeat Lesson

I think it’s that time of year again, where we have a conversation we’ve had many times before. Yet it seems to repeatedly fall on deaf ears or blind eyes as the case may be.

The message is a simple one; just because something is written, it does not mean the author still feels the same way.

Emotions are an amazing thing, an ever changing thing and when you write the way I and many other bloggers write, you’re capturing a moment when those emotions existed. The problem being the length of time those moments existed varies wildly.

There have been times I’ve written a blog and by the time I’ve proofread it, I no longer feel the same way. But I still post those blogs. I need to in order for the larger story to make sense in the long run. If you start omitting pieces of the story, it has a way of becoming disingenuous and that’s the last thing I want.

However, because I’m posted things I may have felt only briefly, I get incredibly irritated when people I know start questioning me about things that happened weeks, if not months ago. It’s the reason I don’t give out my URL (yet somehow people still manage to find it). I write what I feel at the time, you can hear it in some of my blog that as I’m writing, I’m working through it so there is no point in questioning me about the top of the blog if by the bottom I’m a sane person again.

People always claim they understand this, but when it comes down it they don’t. I understand it’s just human nature, but just let things play out rather than tamper with it after the fact.

Anyways, my dears, that is my, what feels like, yearly rant on the matter. Let me know in the comment box below if you have the same problem. And as always stay and play safe.

Love,

The Honest Bitch 
xoxo

Friday 8 March 2013

Life Lesson 384

Trying to write a blog; while on muscle relaxants and painkillers is a complete waste of time.

I woke up this morning to something I can only assume was my attempt at blogging last night. I’m fairly certain most of it wasn’t in English and I’m positive the “pink squidgy marshmallow man” I was writing about is actually my Animal pillow. At least I hope it is.

I’m a little hazy on the details of last night but my back feels much less evil today, so, cheer to the “pink squidgy marshmallow man” I guess lol

What is the last event in your life that you’re a little hazy about? Let me know in the comment box below and while you’re at it what else could “pink squidgy marshmallow man” be? As always stay and play safe.

Love,

The Honest Bitch 
xoxoxo

Sunday 9 December 2012

Troll Bitch Slap

I wrote a blog in July called “What Women Want”; this blog was not written as a guide to a happy, healthy relationship, hell it wasn’t even written with the intent that men would do everything on this list. It was written so men could pick one or two to try and stay in our good books since what we actually want is forever changing.

This week some troll, who clearly has women issues thought he would comment on my blog and now I’m going to put that little fucker in his place.

“What a crock of shit. This entire blog reeks of spoiled princess syndrome, what self-entitled bitch expects the man to do all this? Why should I? For your body? If I want just a body, I can pay for it, and probably get far better than what you're offering”

Let me start by saying I pity the dumb airhead that ends up with you. Also you don’t need to worry about anything on the list because any woman with half a brain would spray you with pepper spray before letting you get anywhere near their body.

“Be Generous - Why the fuck should I spend my hard earned cash for you? You know the idea of seeing someone is because you LIKE/LOVE them as a person. Not what they can provide for you. How about you get rid of spoiled princess syndrome? A man shouldn't need to buy your ass gifts to keep your slutty head focused on him.”

In the blog I do say be generous, nobody likes a tightwad however if you could read you’d know I also said it doesn't have to be anything big it’s the thought that counts. I also suggest picking her flowers. Being generous doesn’t mean spending money; you can also be generous with your time or your compliments. However in your case I’m pretty sure nobody wants any of your fucking time.

“Be Honest - A rule that a lot of women should follow instead of leading men on. Men are probably more inclined to be direct with a woman than a woman is to men. Ever had some bitch ignore you're phone calls or texts hoping you'll take the hint? That's because they don't have the balls to upright tell you. More women do this than me.”

Did your mommy not love you? Is that where all the hate comes from or are you naturally just a whiny cry baby who clearly needs a glass of man the fuck up? Have you ever considered that your attitude may be making these women have a “don’t call me I’ll call you” attitude. If it doesn’t change there will be millions more doing it to you..Guaranteed!

“Have Eyes For Only Her - I think most men will follow this rule once most females get rid of their fucking cling-on male guys that are "just friends" to boost your ego, you attention whore. We know exactly what you bitches are doing, we're not stupid. A mature person with high-confidence shouldn't NEED validation that they're good looking or a great person by having orbiters, it should come from THEMSELVES.”

Really, you’re not stupid that’s the argument you’re going for? Have you read what you’ve been writing, because you sound pretty damn stupid to me. Women and men can be just friends without their being any “ego boosting” a fact you’d know if you actually had any friends or if anyone wanted to be around you.  Aside from that what does men who window shop for other ladies while with a women have to do with “just friends”?

“Never Follow a Women - Nothing gets more annoying than some passive woman that refuses to take lead and expects to be spoonfed everything everywhere. You're an adult. Not a child. Why would I want a woman where I have to do all the decision making like I'm her father, instead of one that's a mature adult who contributes just as much as I do? MASSIVE turn off. I don't want to date a fucking child. I want to date an adult.”

You’re adult not child so start using your brain like one. What you’re saying about passive women was the exact same point I was making about passive men you dipshit!

“Staying on power - Stop with your petty games. Relationships shouldn't be about control. If you're a mature enough person, they should be about commitment, understanding and working together. Not power plays. Power plays is for people that have no fucking clue what a proper relationship is.”

You mean keep the power, a point I made about men not being lap dog, it had nothing to do with games and everything to do with men being men and not whiny little babies like you’re doing now.

If you took a second to read my blog you’d know nobody here is weak or child-like, all my readers and myself are strong women. And Strong women need strong men. Men who can handle us being us and as you so kindly pointed out most men can’t, they turn into sniffling little baby around women who know what they want.

If you have a problem with any of that get the fuck off my site and go find somewhere weak minded little men are welcome.

-The Honest Bitch

Friday 19 October 2012

Lesson Learned

While researching an upcoming blog I came across a lot of ridiculous dating rules and my first response was “if you have to implement any special rules in a relationship, the relationship isn’t worth it.”

It seems completely logical, if you can’t make a relationship work with common decency, it’s just not meant to be, you shouldn’t need stupid little rules to make it work.

As logical as this seems to me now, this was one lesson I had to learn.

A few years back when I was dating The Grinch, I put in place the “teddy clause”.  This was a rule that stated every time he messed up and made me cry he had to buy me a teddy bear.

My thought behind it was if he had to send money and go to girly places to buy teddy bears every time he messed up he might change his attitude. Kind of like a swear jar with teddy bears.

The rule was pretty much completely ineffective. I ended up with a lot of lovely teddy bears and he ended up still being a dick.

Looking back now, it’s more than clear he didn’t give a flying fuck about how his actions were affecting me. What I should have done in hindsight is dump his sorry fuck-wit ass and moved on to bigger and better things.

Nobody needs people like that in their life’s, it’s not worth that headaches and stress. Life is too short to deal with assholes.

I like to try and take something positive from all my relationships even if it’s just a lesson learned and by me sharing these lessons with you guys hopefully you won’t make my mistakes. 

So what other relationship lessons have you guys learned? Let me know in the comment box below. And as always stay and play safe.

Love,

The Honest Bitch 
xoxoxo

Thursday 29 September 2011

Talk Like A Human

I normal don’t have a problem with people choosing to sound like an idiot. It’s a personal choice if you want to make people to think you failed kindergarten or not. However there are two things that make me want to bitch slap people.

The first one is when people add an X in ask or asked making it into axe or axed.

Why? There is no fucking need for it. It just makes it sound like you never stepped foot in a school. By all means be stupid but you don’t have to sound like you are. Where did the X even come from? It’s not like X is a commonly used letter in the English language. Some people just shouldn’t be allowed to open their mouths.

Speaking of people who shouldn’t be allowed to talk that brings me to the second thing that drives me crazy.  People who pronounce the silent H in words.

I remember be taught in first or second grade that you don’t pronounce the H in words like what and where. So who decided once you become fully grown you can start pronouncing that H? Did the H get jealous and decided it was time for him to start talking?

Some people blame Hollywood for whole H not being so silent thing but I blame stupid people emulating Hollywood. I mean it’s not a trend if only a few people do it. People should be smart enough to put a stop to things at are clearly stupid and make you sound stupid along with it.

All I ask is for people to use their brain and if you don’t have one keep your mouth shut so I don’t have to hear your nonsense.  

I’m heading off to find a way to cool off (stupid English weather). As always stay safe.

Love,

The Honest Bitch
xoxo

Thursday 8 September 2011

NTB Update

Since NTB's guest post a couple weeks ago you’ve been asking for an update on him and his love interest. I spoke to him last week and he’s given me the ok to fill you guys in on what’s been happening. He’d also like me to thank you guys for your support and comments, they really helped him.

He spoke her not along after he wrote the blog and that went.....well it could have gone better. She tossed out some words, like clingy and too old. That caused me to roll my eyes, because there is only 3 years between them. He also mentioned to me he thinks she may be crushing on someone else.

After that conversation he rightfully decided to her some space and let things cool off before finding out where he truly stands with her.

He went to see her at work a couple days ago; he only managed to have a partial conversation with her because she wanted him to leave before her "friend" came back. From what he said there were some good signs though. She gave him a massive hug and seemed really happy to see him.

His plan was to say sorry for coming across clingy and acting like they were in a relationship she didn’t want. I’m not too sure how much of that conversation he actually manage to have with her though.

The night he went to talk to her I waited up to make sure he was ok. He’s a good friend and plus you guys would kill me if I didn’t. He said something about a ring pointing the wrong way so she’s off the market. Which even now, sitting here typing this sounds crazy.

He’s decided to take some of your advice and back off and give her space. If she has feeling for him, which she does, hopefully she’ll come to him. My fingers are crossed for him, and not just because it would shut you guys up about us getting together. He deserves to be in a happy relationship.

In the meantime his eye is on a customer from work. I don’t know much about her but from what he’s said she’s a pretty girl with a gorgeous smile. I love his back bounciness and the fact most of us would be a little bitter after the summer he had but instead he’s just happy if she’s happy. We could all learn something from him.

His movie like romance may not be my cup of tea but I’m sure this knight in shining armour will find his princess. He’s just too good to remain single for long.

Love you guys,

The Honest Bitch
xoxoxoxo


Saturday 27 August 2011

Guest Post: Summer Love, Life Lessons

(I couldn’t pick a better person to be my first guest blogger. He’s a dear friend of mine and almost as opinionated as I am. As always be sure to leave your comments and feedback I’m sure he’ll appreciate it and so will I.)

Ladies and Gentlemen…ah, who am I kidding, ladies and ladies because if you read this blog and you’re a guy you’re likely to feel your testicles slowly falling off…trust me on that…don’t ask how I know. Anyway, this blog is usually dedicated to relationships and real encounters from a real person. These stories by THB are real and can happen in the real world. I can’t say I’m entirely saddened by her unfortunate relationship past because it led her to be who she is today; honest and open, which means if I have doubts about a certain topic in my relationship, she’ll tell me what’s up. She’s a great friend too. But most often in this blog we hear about and talk about how we suffer from the negative, relationships ending, relationships not starting, relationships going in the wrong direction and the dreaded “friend zone”. I am the most loathed “NTB” that THB talks about from time to time. I believe that romance isn’t dead and I am often referred to as the nice guy or the sweet guy. Don’t all get sick at once, I have a dark side too but underneath all the layers I usually care about people in general, and I find myself going the extra mile for people all the time. I don’t let myself get taken advantage of but I do believe that you have to risk a little to get anything in this world, but this is a false start, past the point of no return. To truly understand why I am writing this blog you need to hear it from the beginning, so here goes:

This summer started like any other, as per usual I finished up my university workload and I was ready to find a job and spend some time working out and relaxing. See…the problem with me is that my previous relationship ended very badly and killed, or at least I thought it killed a side of me, the sweet side that cares about people, the side that comforts them. Don’t get me wrong, I was still nice and I cared about my friends but I was beyond the whole “I want to impress this girl” phase…or so I thought. After 2 months of working at my new job, a girl transferred to the coffee shop in my neighbourhood and my god…was she the cutest thing ever. Despite having the cutest smile and biggest most beautiful eyes you could imagine, she was more than just someone who looked good, after talking I found that we had a lot in common, love of all meat pizza (big time points :-)), good movies and a troubled relationship past. Now I would like to point out that troubled relationship pasts are not for the weak of heart, if you are going to try to get a girl who doesn’t want anything to do with guys to trust you, you will have an uphill battle in front of you, I promise. So, on my way out with my friends some night, I noticed that she was working the overnight shift, so my friends and I went clubbing for a bit and then, after being stone cold fucking sober we decided that dancing with chicks downtown was not as much fun as it could have been…well, what do you expect morons, it’s fucking Tuesday! Anyway after all this had been done I suggested that we drive back to my work and we go see the girl I, at this point, had a bit of a crush on. Now they didn’t want to take a trip back to where we just came so I promised them I would give her my number before we left. I stopped into the coffee shop, ordered my two wingmen something and ordered a double cupped coffee for myself. Immediately I needed help…no pen…fuck, plan A is dying. (Don’t worry plan A works after so no need for me to list plans A-S23 for you…yeah, I over prepare…wanna fight about it?) Anyway, I needed a pen, one of my wingmen asked her (the girl I like) for a pen so that I might write my name and number for her. On the bottom of the second coffee cup I put my name and number and while on the way out I gave it to her and I said “this is my name and number, if you want to use it, great, if not, no hard feelings, ok?”. After all, we did work in the same neighbourhood and I didn’t want things to be odd for her because I do stop in on a semi-regular basis. She gave a smile and I’m sure she was a little caught off guard. Now, I don’t know what you all will think of this, whether you would text an odd looking blonde dude dressed in all black after he gave you his number on the bottom of a coffee cup but SHE did text me. We’ve been talking pretty much ever since and we’ve been having a good time. Around 2-3 weeks of getting to know her I knew I was in trouble. See, the problem is that I don’t make connections with females easily, I generally have a more mature sense of humour and don’t like when girls don’t get me or can’t laugh at the same things. It won’t offend me but when I am living my life I generally get down sometimes and I just need someone who can say one thing to make me laugh and the day will be, not necessarily better, but liveable again. But if you don’t get me, you’ll never say the right thing. This is purely a me thing, I don’t suggest asking for someone who understands you and will know how to cheer you up because you’ll be single for as long as I have been *checks calendar* …yep…too long. I’ve had my opportunities with girls, don’t get me wrong, but I don’t believe in bullshit, if you can’t make a relationship…what’s the point? I don’t play games and I don’t like being played…at all…I personally think it’s very cruel to play with someone who just admitted they like you. Especially when it’s as hard to do as it was for me. Admitting you’re nuts about a girl is hard, to say the least, telling them is another feat entirely, but as I’m sure you’re beginning to tell, I am not faint of heart, so of course the second I knew that I was falling for her a little, I told her.

This is where things get hard for me, its not that she wasn’t into me, but that she had been hurt before…a lot, her first serious boyfriend didn’t treat her well and was throwing out years of commitment. She was broken, but that’s ok, I can redeem a guy or two… I think, or at least for her…I’ll try. We hang out for a bit and she seems kinda lukewarm to me, nothing amazing going on with her side of the table, I don’t blame her, I’m not really all that amazing when I’m tired and just finished a shift at work and hungover but we keep talking. I bring her treats at work after my shift and run down to see her to keep her company for a bit and then run home, if she says she’s hungry, I’ll bring her food, if she says she feels sick I’ll nurse her back to health as much as I can. I’d do anything for this girl. As you may realize, and I didn’t, the part of me that cares about someone more than I normally do and tries to comfort them (the really nice side of me)…is alive and well at this point and SHE revived it. I hate that side of me because now I’m stuck, I’m stuck wanting her to like me and she is still just either beginning to trust me or likes me but not enough to be more than friends. I don’t know, she’s really careful not to hurt my feelings, she fired a “we’re just friends” out and saw the crushed look on my face and then felt the need to tell me that I was the first person who’s number she had gotten that she actually used, or that before I came along she wasn’t interested in guys at all after her previous boyfriend. I guess now I hit the point where I was sick of the puzzles, the games and trying to figure her out. It was interesting but I had far too much invested (and that’s my own fault). I needed to know something. I recently took her to a party and nothing really happened. See, the thing is ladies and gents (see, I just did it for equality) you can’t just play around, at some point things need to fall away and you need to let someone in and tell them, at least a little, how you feel. This point hasn’t happened and it’s been more than a month. I’m not saying I’m impatient, I’m just saying that it seems more and more that she’s trying to keep me at arms length and only might pull me in.

This is the dreaded “friend zone”. This is what happens when you become too nice and let them value who you are. They become comfortable with you and you get stuck here, they want nothing more than that. A lot of people look at this as a “death sentence” to a relationship or the potential of one…it is. However, even though I am stuck, there is the hope of moving out of the friend zone, I’ve seen it happen, though it is rare. But, when you don’t make many connections with girls and you find something you’ve been waiting for after such a long time you’re willing to do a lot for the possibility of having something really special. But in my case, again being brave and hoping to not here the “let’s just be friends” phrase that haunts my dreams, I said to her “Listen, if you wanted to be just friends, I would understand, I know that people sometimes turn their backs on other people when they say that but …I just really want you to be happy, I like you enough that I would let you go if that’s what you really wanted and I’d still be there for you after.” She told me that she respected me and that she “doesn’t know yet”. This, my friends…is supposed to be a good sign… Whatever, I’m spinning the wheels a bit here. I gave her an out and she didn’t take it. Anyway, moving forward, I have known her for a month and a bit, I’m crazy about her, I think about her all the time and she very clearly doesn’t have the same interest level, now that’s not to say she’s not interested at all, we hang out and have fun and flirt, she has said I’m sweet and she has shown that she cares about me but she sometimes tries to hide that she cares about me and usually tries to make her interest seem that of just slightly more than that of a basic friend, but I forgive her that as I know that its hard to trust people when your last serious relationship was a massive blow up and you really don’t want anything to do with guys for a while, not to mention that I’ve only known her for a month and a bit. I guess the difference is that I know that I want her; I know we’d be great together, but I don’t think she’s as optimistic.

This is the conclusion and while it I have already stated that it is the conclusion, it is also the end. I don’t play games and I don’t want to, and keeping me at arms length is not doing me any favours, I give and give and it seems all very one sided. Now, don’t blame her, she doesn’t ask for anything, I just listen and hear things she wants and act based on what I know. Yes, I am the nice guy but maybe she doesn’t want the nice guy, or any guy, or maybe she wants a guy, maybe a nice one, but not me in particular. That’s fine. The reason I say that this is fine is because I am sick of the people who feel they need to protect themselves, who feel that they need to test and hide. This summer, I took a risk on a beautiful, amazing, intelligent girl. I can safely say that she’s the most amazing girl I’ve ever met and I really want to be more than I am to her, sadly, I don’t think I will be, but I have been wrong before. I sit here, defeated, out of ideas, down, but I’m not out! Until she tells me that she doesn’t want me as anything more than a friend, I will keep trying, it might hurt me in the end but she’s worth the effort. And the pain you ask? Well, let me reference the beginning: you can’t get anything in this world without risking something. You will not have a successful relationship without risking your feelings, you won’t get the your desired job if you don’t apply for fear of rejection and you won’t ever know if something could develop between you and the cute girl at the coffee shop unless you give her your number. So, to all the THB lovers and readers, though we may have all of the hurt and baggage of relationships passed sitting on our shoulders and the “lessons” of the past in our heads. I ask not that you denounce your experience, as the lesson of not going for a “boob grab” on the first date is an actual pure gold lesson that I think should be taught in primary school. I merely ask that you lower your protection, we’ve all been hurt before but you can’t just shut down, you need to love with all of your heart, put something of yourself into the things you do for a someone special, don’t worry about rejection and the agony so much, because at the end of the day the effort that you put in might have been rejected but it might have meant a lot to that someone special. For you sports fans, Babe Ruth was the leader of the league in homeruns but he was also the leader in strikeouts, the lesson? Keep swinging and swinging hard, you’ll hit one eventually.

Never, EVER, give up on something you like or love until its gone for sure because you’ll never forgive yourself for not fighting, for not trying. But you can forgive yourself for failing. If you gave everything you could, you’ll have nothing to be ashamed of. I won’t sugar coat it, relationships hurt, they’re hard and they can end badly…this is beginning to sound a lot like sex…but remember that they can also change your life, they can make you happier than you were and they can make see a side of yourself that you thought dead and gone (see entire article). So, I thought to myself, even though I have failed I think people should see that its not all about the end result, in fact, you’ll find relationships are about the journey, and someone who is truly worth it, will make the journey worthwhile. Remember, however, that journey’s are long, sometimes painful and sometimes end suddenly…here we go with sounding like sex again. So, finally, my tail end advice, if you skipped the whole article to get here this is really all you need…sorry to all of you who read my story :-). Don’t be reckless with people’s hearts and don’t put up with those that are reckless with yours, love like haven’t been hurt, hold people you care about close because all relationships need maintenance at some point. Finally, even though we talk snide about our previous relationships, don’t let the negative emotions fill you with the ideas and pessimism that things will never work. I am writing this after failing and I know that I don’t have anything to be ashamed of, I treated that girl well and yeah, it probably won’t work out but at the very least I met someone amazing that restored my faith that I can fall for someone again and yes, I am hurt but the journey was worth it.

Thursday 18 August 2011

Dating Horror Story – The Grinch who stole my 21st birthday

Since you guys seemed to really enjoy my last relationship horror story I thought I’d share another one with you. This one is about the Grinch who stole my 21st birthday.

I met the Grinch at my local pub which in hindsight should have been my first red flag. I had been eyeing him up for months and he was flirting back but never made a move. So on New Year’s Eve I decided fuck it and made the first move myself. We ended up having a great night and we swopped numbers.

For the next month we texted and chatting a little but not much more than that. The guy moved slower than a snail. With a little pushing from my friend we ended up in a relationship just after Valentine’s Day.

It was never a happy relationship the guy had issues. Issues he managed to hide pretty damn well until we were in an actual relationship. He had problems knowing when to stop drinking and I later found out he did drugs too. Which would have been a deal breaker if I had known.

One night he called me from town drunk begging me to come get him. So I agreed to pick him up. Not a great idea. I couldn’t get the idiot out of my car. I spent 40 minutes outside his house trying to get him out. Pulling, pushing, and kicking him. I wasn’t having much luck. I managed to get him half way out of my car. Then he looked at me laughed and got back in and shut my car door. Needless to say I didn’t find it so funny. I gave up after that and drove home and left him in my car to sleep it off.

I went inside and got ready for bed. About 3 hours later I hear a noise at my front door. I got out of bed to check it out and it was the Grinch trying to get in my house with his house key. Needless to say I wasn’t impressed. I let him in because I had no real choice and let the asshole take my bed and I took the couch. I was ready to dump his sorry ass but I listened to friends and gave him another chance. (That was a stupid move and I’m no longer friends with those people.)

In May of that year he dragged me to a family wedding. We all know how I feel about weddings. This wedding was worse because his family is a walking, talking Adam’s Family. It was a fucking nightmare. Or should that be he was a fucking nightmare.

He was drunk and loud and really rude to his family. I was embarrassed to be seen with him. He was such as ass I actually ended up putting him on the floor. The dude was acting like a fucking child. It was total nightmare.

I had every plan on dumping him but it was 10 days till my birthday so I decided to hang on until then. I figured I deserved a present after the way he acted. I never did get the present because two days before my birthday he dumped me. That’s right that poor excuse for a man dumped me.

Needless to say I was more than a little pissed off. I wasn’t hurt or sad about the break up; I was just plain old mad. Who was he to dump me after the way he acted?

He added to my anger when I found out he had plans to pop in and see me at my birthday party. I had been saying for months I didn’t want to do anything for my birthday but him and my best friend at the time forced me into planning a night out. Once we broke up I figured I didn’t have to go out now. And I was free to spend the night the way I wanted to. I was wrong.

I actually had a great night until Mr. Grinch showed up. When I saw him I actually saw red. I really don’t remember much after that until we were outside talking and he said something. I guess I didn’t like what he said because I punched him square in the jaw. He was out cold. I remember feeling cheated because he went down so easily, I wanted to kick the shit out of him. The real punch line is he’s a personal trainer who had just gotten back from a boxing course. Guess they forgot to teach him how to keep his hands up.

I got a lot of praise for punching him and putting him in his place. Guess he had rubbed more than just me up the wrong way. As good as it felt, it really sucks that’s how my 21st will always be remembered. He stole the night from me. Why would you show up where you knew your ex is going to be on her birthday?

It still makes me mad to think about that relationship. But I’ve learned my lesson. Never date people you have a chance of running into once you’ve broken up. Stay safe guys.

Love,

The Honest Bitch
xoxoxoxo

Sunday 26 June 2011

This Needs To Be Said

This needs to be said.....

When you’re constantly breaking up and getting back together, that is NOT a relationship. That is a fuck friend who doesn’t know the rules.

Stop being so naive, he doesn’t love you, he doesn’t miss you, and he sure as hell doesn’t want to make it work, and before you say it, NO, YOUR MAN IS NOT DIFFERENT!

He’s horny. It’s simple.

Stop lying to yourself and more importantly stop making everyone hear about how he’s going to change. You my dear, are nothing but a place for him to rest his penis in.

There is nothing wrong with this per se. Fuck friends are great, but you need to be aware that’s what you are.

So stop the drama and either call a spade a spade or move on with your life. Don’t be stupid and pretend there’s something there when there clearly isn’t. It just makes you look pathetic and meek. Stop making the rest of us look bad and being a disgrace to the female race.

That’s my 2 cents and I’m sure you’ll tell me yours. Love you guys and as always stay safe.

Love,

The Honest Bitch

xoxoxoxo

Sunday 12 June 2011

Four Kinds of Girl

Over all my years of being friends with and dating far too many guy I’ve come to work out that in their minds women fall into 4 main categories, needy, pushy, stupid or bitch. And they will always whiny about a girl no matter which of these categories she falls into. Unless you’re in the process of making him cum, a guy will always find something to bitch about. You can never win; you can just shut him up for extended periods of time.

If you enjoy spending time with your boyfriend, sending texts or talking on the phone with him you fall into the “needy” category. You may be the most impendent person on the planet but when he is out with the guys and you text him even if he messages you first you’re needy. This is where things being so black and white in man-land gets them into trouble, Everyone knows there are different levels of neediness but you’d never know that listening to them talk.

If you have ever asked a guy out, approached a guy or told him to stop playing games you fall into the “pushy” category. In my personal experience sometimes you need to be pushy when it comes to guys but no man will ever see it that way. The only good pushy in the male mind is if you’re pushy in the bedroom. It messes with their male ego otherwise.

Now for the “stupid” category, these are the girl's guys date once with the intention of sleeping with them and never calling again. In my books it’s only stupid if you fall for their bullshit. But once again they’d never admit that in man-land.

The last category is bitch. There are 2 main ways to end up in this category. The first way is be opinionated and have your own views on things. I’ll never understand why women like that rub so many men up the wrong way but a lot of men hate it. The other way is to play the game they do. Show no interest, use them just for sex, and make them come to you. Keep that up for any period of time and they’ll soon be calling you a bitch.

Personally I don’t see anything wrong with being a bitch so they call me one all they like. I have a mind of my own and opinions and I don’t follow men around like a lost puppy so if that makes me a bitch, I’ll own it. Hello world I’m bitch, deal with it!

You’ll never please everyone so don’t every change who you are, especially to please a man. Just be who you are and own it. Sooner or later someone will come along who will take you for what you are. Don’t ever lose any sleep over him either because I’m willing to bet he isn’t losing any over you. Chalk it up to experience and move on.

As always my dears stay safe and don’t stress over things you can’t change.

Love,

The Honest Bitch

xoxoxoxoxo

Sunday 5 June 2011

Keep Off

This may sound weird coming from someone who blogs about every detail of her life but I’m going to say it anyways......... Keep your shit off Facebook!

There are so many reasons why you shouldn’t write your personal business on Facebook, I can’t even think of a good reason to do it, so stop!

First of all you’re making things worse. The second you post your problem with someone else on Facebook you’ve gone from it being between you and the person, to it being the business of everyone on your friends list. It may as well have been on the evening news; it’s in their news feed after all.

So now you have people, possibly perfect strangers add fuel to the flame. Everyone has their 2 cents on the matter. Everyone has advice to give and opinions. And don’t forget the other person is reading this, watching you spread gossip and bad mouthing them so instead of calming down they’re getting angrier.

Because they’re getting angrier they post a status too, so now you have their friends getting involved. Your joint friends end up taking sides. This upsets you both more. Sooner or later you start commenting on each other’s statuses. And the whole thing goes from something small to the worlds ending.

Not sounding like such a good idea now is it?

Might I add just because some of your friends aren’t commenting doesn’t mean they’re not reading what’s going on. And I’m willing to bet most of them are probably thinking you sound like a whiny small child.

Then you have the problem when you two make up that you’re left looking like an idiot to everyone on Facebook. You can’t get around that fact, once it’s all said and done, you’re left with 100’s of Facebook friends who read what was happening, and now think you’re an idiot.

So if you don’t want to be labelled a whiney idiot think before you write a status and take my advice is to keep your shit off Facebook.

I love you guys, and as always stay safe.

Love,

The Honest Bitch
xoxoxoxo

Monday 18 April 2011

Nobody Good Hates Hockey

I once asked Steve Dangle if he’d date someone who didn’t like hockey and in reply he sent me a message saying “Nobody good hates hockey”. I’m not sure Dangle is the best person to be getting dating advice from but in this case I think he’s right.

That’s not to say everyone who hates hockey is a bad person. It’s more to say in a relationship you have to respect your partner’s passions. Its one thing to have different interests but to flat out hate something your partner is passionate about is an another matter.

In my personal experience I’ve found guys who hate hockey to be narrow minded and more often than not complete assholes. Based on that, I’m turning Dangle’s quote into a relationship law. I will no longer being dating anyone who hates hockey because nobody wroth dating hates hockey.

Anyways I’m heading off guys, Stay safe

Love

The Honest Bitch

xoxoxo

Sunday 13 March 2011

Speaking My Mind

Last week Neal said something to me about venting and if I have a problem with it he has messages with me venting. He may have been joking but my first thought was good ahead girlfriend.

I vent to stop me saying things to people I’ve already said to them. It stops me becoming a broken record. I may be a bitch not I’m not sneaky. If I have something to say I’ll say it. I’m not afraid to speak my mind.

My rants are talked about years after the fact. Besides changing men on a weekly basics, I’m known for my rants and if you think I’d waste my “A” material on a someone who is as good as imaginary, you’re crazy.

I love Neal dearly, he’s a great guy but he’s not getting my “A” material unless I ever feel the need to get pissed off with him. Which is unlikely, we just snap at each other and I ended up in tears. It’s never got to the point when I’ve needed to sling comments at him. Plus I wouldn’t want to; my blogs reaches 500 people less than his videos. Life lesson – Never fuck with people that are more powerful then you.

I understand the importance of playing nice. You can’t speak to everyone in the same way. Some people need things wrapped up in a positive bow and others you can tell them straight. I’d rather tell people straight, I don’t like to play nice but I can do it unlike some people I know. That why I like Mr. X he has the inability to play nice and I love that. You don’t have to read in-between the lines with him, he’ll tell you how it is with no regard for human feelings.

Anyways dolls I have things to do, I’ll speak to you all soon. As always stay safe.

Love

The Honest Bitch
xoxoxo

Tuesday 1 February 2011

Crying and Learning

For me crying is kind of like shaking an Etch- A-sketch, it’s an emotional slat cleaner. Whether I’m mad, sad or hurt once I cry I’m able to drop it and move on. So I’ll admit I cry a far bit, but only about my issues. I’m not someone who cries and funerals or weddings, I rarely cry at movies or TV so imagine my surprise when I my eyes watered and I started to cry over a friends situation.

He was talking to me about how he told a girl he liked her. He knew she was in a relationship so he knew nothing would happen but he wanted her to know how he felt. He went on to tell me about how he only wanted her to be happy and how even if they were just friends she still made him happy and smile so either way he’s a winner.

I think he’s a winner because of his attitude. He just sees the positive, he’s strength and pose just amazes me. He sees the girl he loves daily and he’s strong enough to put his feelings to one side and just care about her happiness and will being. That’s amazing.

I remember how I felt dealing with the Mr. X drama and despite the fact I wanted the best for him, it still really hurt and to be honest it changed the way I deal with guys. I’ve been single longer than I’ve ever have been and that because I can’t put myself in the position to be hurt again. I’m not strong enough to do what he’s done and the fact anyone could do that is inspiring.

He came out with “sometimes you have to be thankful for what you have and not what you want.” I think those are some words to remember. You can’t have everything you want and you should just make the most of what you do have. That boy is wise beyond his years.

I’ve talked a lot about it this year, turning negatives into positives and this man seems to embody that lesson. Personally I’m just happy to take the opportunity to learn from someone else’s experience and find new ways of looking at things.

I’m sure with an outlook like his he’ll find someone who will treat him the way he treats people. He’s a busy man so maybe it’s all just a blessing for him so can focus on what he needs to do now. But I’m sure he’ll find someone fantastic.

As for me I’m sticking with single for a while longer. Although if the price of batteries keep going up I may change my mind lol

As always stay safe and try and treat people how you’d like to be treated.

Love Always

The Honest Bitch
xoxoxoxo

Thursday 6 January 2011

Turning a negative into a positive

Being a Toronto Maple Leafs fan I was born with thick thin. We are the most chirped and hated team in the NHL and because of this, we learn from a young age to have a sense of humour about things. We know we suck and half the chirping you hear about the Leafs are from other Leafs fan. And might I say our chirps are more original and funny then ones by other teams. The Maple Leafs last won Lord Stanley’s cup in 1967. That was before man walk on the moon. Here’s one for you that was before the 911 emergency service started. Hell Canada wasn’t even a hundred years old yet. Because of these horrible facts Leafs fans are experts in turning negatives into positives. Whether it just a joke that makes people smile (throwing waffles) or just enjoy the little victory like a good hit or great fight.

This is one of those hockey lessons that translates well into your day to day life, things may suck but there‘s still something positive you can take from it.

I’m not a positive person in general, my mind set isn’t “it’s raining....well the flowers will get watered”. My mind set is more “fuck my jeans are going to get wet.” However when it comes to relationships or work I like to forget the feelings and the tears and just hold on to the lessons. There is no use beating yourself up about things you can’t change but if you learned a lesson and are able to successfully apply that lesson in the future. It’s been worth it.

You may have gotten hurt once, but the lesson you learned from it will prevent you getting hurt again. So if 1 heartache can prevents 5 more....I think the lesson paid for its self. You may completely hate someone for what they’ve done, that my dear friend is motivation. Hate isn’t a negative thing if you do positive with it.

I’m heading off guys. I hope your 2011 has started off well. Remember 2011 it’s not rocket science.

Love Always

The Honest Bitch
xoxoxoxo