Friday 27 November 2020


 Apologies this post is going up late, but I wasn’t sure I wanted to write anything this week. It’s been a hard week and to be honest I kind of just wanted to let in pass and try to reset, but I think it’s important to continue to write and keep things as normal as I can.

That said things aren’t normal, and I am struggling.

I am doing what I can to stay level-headed, not cause myself issues later. I am taking a step back from a lot of things and am in survival mode. I know it’ll be ok, and I’ll get there, its just going to take time.

Anyways I am off to play the sims. As always stay and play safe.


The Honest Bitch 

Friday 20 November 2020

Well That Didn’t Last Long


Apparently, ladies and gentlemen, it was not me and dating you had to worry about, it was Hugh and dating that should have been the concern. After 5 dates we have decided to call things off. Hugh just isn’t ready yet, and I completely understand, I was there. And to be honest, I had my suspicions early on this may have been the case, but I chose to ignore the red flag. I, however, don’t really regret that decision.

I am hopeful that Hugh and I can remain friends, actually hanging out, doing things friends. I’ve said this all along things are easy between us, we can giggle and talk, and we share a lot of the same interests. My guard has been down with him from almost the very beginning, I have been just me and he’s handled it well. I kid that someone has given him a handbook or manual on how to deal with me. It’s just natural to him. When my mom passed away, he was perfect. I know how bad that could have been for me if he wasn’t there. He instinctively calms me down and he doesn’t know he’s doing it. He often places his hand on the part of my back, I press against the wall to calm my anxiety. I feel better when I am with him.

It makes me giggle because he was so concerned about me attaching when we were dating. And I did, but not in the loved up mushy way. I attached in a this person is awesome and I like having them around way. He is a good guy and I like him as a human. He’s the only person right now I can be totally honest with. I feel alone and he helps without knowing. I can just be myself, no walls, no acts, just me and it’s nice. With everyone else, I have to tough, I have to be strong, I have things I needed to worry about, perceptions, gossip. None of that is a thing with him, I get to just be.

I pray, nothing changes this. Truth be told, I didn’t need or want a boyfriend or the sex (no matter how good it may have been), I needed a friend and he’s a pretty damn good one.

Anyways, I am off before my eyes leak juices everywhere. As always, my dears, stay and play safe.


The Honest Bitch 

Friday 13 November 2020


 After my recent posts it has become clear I need to do a Q&A. I was hoping I wouldn’t have to, but you guys have questions, and they deserve answers. At least some of them do…. Some were just plain old rude. So, let’s jump into this, shall we?

Are you and Hugh dating or just fuck-friends?

That is a good question, and I don’t really have an answer for it. I am going with we are “whatevering”. I am not really concerning myself with labels. We’re having fun and going with the flow.

Is this going to be a similar situation to Chicken Man?

Impressive recall memory, to those of you that remember him. For those of you that are new here; Chicken Man was a fuck friend from over a decade ago that turned into a relationship. I doubt that is the case here. I will never say never, but Hugh is very clear, and I am not sure I would even want that myself.

You have a history of making bad decisions when stressed; are you actually ok with the situation?

True story, I really do make piss poor decisions when I’m under stress. However, I made this decision before the stress. I am in my right mind when I weighted up what I was doing here, and I am steadfast is this decision as a result.

Are you going to let Hugh know about the blog?

I have let him know, and he has read it. Not sure how smart that move was, but I am in a giant “fuck it” mood. I am not hiding my crazy with him. To be honest, I don’t care what he thinks. This is me at worst, if he hangs around awesome, he’s here for me… and the sex, mainly the sex. If not… I have batteries.

How can you stop yourself from forming feelings?

You can’t, and I don’t think you should. If we called things off despite knowing the score, I would miss him. I mean, I like him as a human. We have a lot in common and I enjoy beginning with him. I think the whole heartless detached fuck friend style makes things less enjoyable and at the end of the day, I am here to enjoy myself and if that means a few tears, so be it at least it was fun at the time.

 Anyways, I think that’s enough for now, if you have any other questions leave them in the comments below and I’ll think about doing another one of these. As always, stay and play safe.


The Honest Bitch 

Friday 6 November 2020

You Don’t Date

This whole Hugh thing has raised some questioned, and rightly so. I mentioned in the previous posts that he isn’t looking for a relationship and plans to date around. And as I have mentioned in many posts, I hate dating, I hate the area of dating before being in a relationship… I dislike the guessing and uncertainty. I don’t like any of it.

This is different. First of all, I knew from the start what I was getting, I made that choice. There is no guessing, he is a man whore and upfront about it. Second, I don’t want a boyfriend. I am not in the mind set to date, or deal with someone’s bullshit…. But sex…. I kind of want that.

I got lucky when he popped up. Things are very easy between us. We are comfortable with each other; we can talk and have a laugh and most importantly I trust him. I am not stressed about him catching something and giving it to me. Despite knowing he’s fucking about, he’s still a good guy. He just has some wild oats to sow.

Is this ideal? No, but it’s what I need and want right now and maybe him too. I am not worried about it. I am actually more worried what I’d be doing without him…. Some of my exes that have been in my DMs were starting to look tempting.

Anyways, I am off. Let me know your thoughts in the comments below and as always. Stay and play safe.


The Honest Bitch


Tuesday 3 November 2020

Nothing Goes to Plan

I am sure you’ve noticed I have back dated a few blogs in an attempt to catch you up on all the gossip. This post will be the details on all my dates with Hugh so far. I am writing this the morning after our 4th date just to give you a little perspective.

Date 1: Drinks

This date was lovely when it finally got started, we went for drinks, followed by a lovely walk. And he kissed me on a bridge overlooking the water. He, however, did showed up 40 minutes late to it. Partly my fault, he was trying to calm down my nerves.

After Date 1:

I got put into quarantine after my step dad and the mom tested positive for COVID-19. Hugh and I continued talking and planning a date for my “Freedom Day”.

Right before our second date he sent me a message raising some concerns and double checking I was ok with us not having a relationship and just dating… no commitment. I responded back by telling him I was. He was clear from the start on what his wishes were.

Date 2: Pumpkins?

The second date was on my Freedom Day. The plan was to go around his to carve pumpkins. I got there, he started pushing my comfort level quickly. We know I am not body confident and his hands were everywhere. Let me say, it wasn’t distressful in anyway, it was just the vibe. But it was a lot…. Good though. The pumpkins didn’t happen, but other things did.

This was a little overshadowed by mom, who was in hospital at this point. I ended up freaking out in the middle of the night and crying on. Just what you want on a date. 

Date 3: Pumpkins

To change things up, he decided to come over and we’d carve those pumpkins at last. I was stressed about this date. Things between us were very easy, we have a lot in common, we’re able to laugh and joke. I love how things flow and just feel natural. And with everything going on I didn’t want that to change or be affected.

This date both sucked and was awesome. Early in the evening we got the news my mother passed away. I felt bad for Hugh it’s a strange place to put but he handled it well. And luckily for me that comfort held because I am positive, I would have fallen apart without him there. He gave me a reason to hold it together if that makes sense.  We went on with our evening and carved the pumpkins and watched a film.

I made a mistake that night and asked about other girls and he was honest and told me there were 4 and he had a date with another that upcoming Sunday. I thought as much, but it stung a little. I knew the score and I was happy with it, but…. She had a date, and I was struggling to get another lined up. 

Date 4: Jealous

At some point I gave in an admitted to Hugh, I was jealous. I should have been playing by fuck friend rules, but those can lead to trust issues and I like how easy things are with us, I don’t want to question everything he says. I am comfortable with him. I am actually starting to feel good about his hands on me. His response was to come over. And I am glad he did. After a few minutes of awkwardness. I settled into a nice place. We have a spark, and it was fun to explore that. And while I know he’s not after anything serious, right now this is fun, and I could use some fun. I trust him enough to not worry and to have my walls down, but I don’t feel completely vulnerable. Despite being a bit of playboy he’s a good guy.

Unless he calls things off with me today and which case, he’s a…

Anyways, that’s you guys all up to date now. As always stay and play safe.


The Honest Bitch