Saturday, 31 December 2011

New Year's Eve

Going to start by apologizing to Nathan, apparently, he isn't the only one who thinks I'm currently dating Mr. X. Let me set the record straight for those of you who are confused, I'm not currently nor do I ever plan on dating him.

We have a love/hate relationship and currently I'm in hate with that love/hate relationship. It actually has nothing to do with him for a change. I'm just bored with it all. It's time for a new challenge, preferably one that isn't such a time waster.

Since this is my last post of the year. What I'd normally do is hash out all the many mistakes of the past year in a bid to stop you from following in my footsteps. But this year I feel oddly at peace with everything.

Yeah, some things didn't go my way but in the big picture I played my cards right. It's that life lesson “you can play your hand perfectly, and still lose”. I don't think I have lost anything important, besides, maybe my mind.

I don't do New Year’s resolutions, I think the whole concept is stupid, but I do like to take a deep breath and release all the bullshit from the previous year. I know this time in 12 months it will be a whole new list of bullshit bugging me and nothing that's happening now will be important.

I wouldn't call New Year's a fresh start, because we all know it's not but it’s a fresh perspective on everything. Realizing given a little time, most things fade in importance.

As always, stays safe my dears, and have a great New Year’s Eve and fingers crossed your hangovers aren’t too bad.


The Honest Bitch


Wednesday, 21 December 2011

The Honest Grinch

Let me start by saying sorry and bear with me over the next week or so in regards to my blogging schedule. My computer is dying a slow and painful death making blogging a nightmare.

Plus it is Christmas which means I’m my mother’s slave labour. She’s a baker which means we’re always busy this time of year making far too many cookies, cakes and chocolates.

Don’t get me wrong I love Christmas but I like it on December 1st before all the madness starts. I put on some Christmas music, dance around like a fool putting up the tree. I’m normally done all my Christmas shopping by then so I’ll wrap it all up. I love that part of Christmas....when it’s still fun.

Then around the second week of December I morph into The Honest Grinch. The Christmas music starts driving me crazy. Everyone seems to have me wrapping gifts. Which really pisses me off, since mine is already done.

Then around the 10th of December my job as a cookie wench starts. For the next two weeks I shape, roll, cut and bake around 40 dozen cookies. The oven timer controls my every movement during this time. As if that isn’t enough I also help make and cover more chocolates then I care to count. I’m pretty sure everything I own is now covered in flour, icing sugar and or chocolate.
It’s now December 21st and I’m so over Christmas it isn’t funny. I can’t wait for this all to be over. My back hurts, as much as I love Rockapella their new Christmas album is on my last nerve and if one more person puts a Christmas card through my door I may scream.

I’m also not what you call child friend. So all these screaming, hyper little kids looking forward to seeing Santa gives me the over whelming urge to shake them like a rag doll and tell them they’ve been horrible, loud mouthed little brats all year and Santa cuts up children like that to power his sleigh.

Yes, I’m aware that makes me a horrible person, but at least I’m honest about it.

Despite everything, I don’t hate Christmas. I love a lot of the things that go into it. I just can’t stand this much Christmas. I’m suffering from Christmas burnout. And who can blame anyone for that. Stores start putting their Christmas rubbish out before Halloween. Nobody can deal with that much Christmas.

There is a reason advent calendars only have a maximum of 30 days on it. That’s all of the Christmas spirit one person can take. The stores starting that 30 day clock early ensure more and more people hate Christmas. It’s not special or magical when the stupid thing last for 3 months. By the time it actually gets here even kids are bored of it.

Anyways I have to go get some sleep. I have 12 dozen cookies that need baking and 6 Christmas cakes to ice in the morning......Is it over yet?


The Honest Grinch..... I mean Bitch 

Tuesday, 13 December 2011

The Cloud

Before I start my rant let me give you a little information because a little research goes along way (Yes, I mean you people commenting on TMZ’s image”. The above picture is of The Cloud. It HASN’T been built yet. It’s due to start construction in 2013 in Seoul, South Korea.

Now that you have a little information let’s start the ranting.

Americans are up in arms over this design and I can understand why but at the same time I don’t care if they’re up in arms. Let me explain before you start sharpening your pitch forks.

It would be one thing if The Cloud was being built on US soil but it’s not. It’s being built half way around the world. It’s not exactly rubbing it in anyone’s face; most Americans will never even see the building. Also keep in mind the drawing for this building have been floating around Europe for a few months now and nobody made the connection until the images were released in the states.

I’ll admit when I first saw the above image I was a little shocked. But who wouldn’t be with TMZ’s headline “Intentional or unfortunate mistake?” But after I did a little research about the concept and saw ALL the images available my opinion quickly changed.

I actually really like the design now. In my opinion architecture is like great art, it should make you feel something. After all the comments it’s clear this building makes a lot of people feel a lot of things.

Forgetting the design for a second. I love the concept behind the building it’s meant to be two building connected by clouds. On top of “the clouds” is green space which is a perfect for such a busy city where space is at a premium.

Now back to my rant. I have an issue with some people’s stance on the cloud tower. And it’s an issue that spreads further then just this topic. That issue is...The world doesn’t revolve around America.

Yes, it was a horrible day in your history, and it effected the people of many nations, you have made it  “your history”. It doesn’t bring up the same emotions in other nationalities as it does in your own. I live in England if I say 7/7 would you even know what I was talking about? (The day London was attacked by suicide bomber on public transport)

Different people have different perspectives. Take the White House for example. American’s fill with pride when they see it. I’m Canadian when I see it, I think of it on fire in the war of 1812. Different perspectives and everyone is entitled to their own.

Personally I hope the architect doesn’t change the design. He designed it with something totally different in mind. So get over yourself. Your constitution gives you freedom of speech and ideas. The architect should have the freedom of expressionism. And you’re free to feel about it however you want and I’m free to rant about the little things that tick me off. Like the US media choosing the most Twin Town like image to show. Slow news day?

As always stay safe and keep your pitch fork sharpened.


The Honest Bitch 

Monday, 12 December 2011

Girls and Jackasses

Guys seem to always be asking; ok bitching about how girls seem to go for guys who are assholes. Despite what my “relationship” with Mr. X may lead you to believe I don’t fall into that category.

My attraction to him isn’t based on his jerk like tendencies. I like him because he’s not afraid of me. If he has something to say he’ll say it. He’ll go toe to toe with me if need be. I’m a strong personality and I need someone like that to deal with me.

Saying that doesn’t mean I don’t want a nice guy. I just want a nice guy with a pair of balls. I’m sure I’m not alone in that.

I’m not sure girls actually are going for jackasses. I think some of it goes back to the old days when the guy was the head of the household. It’s not about wanting an ass. It’s about wanting a leader, someone who is strong, decisive and powerful also known as “grrr”.

Grrr is a very important quality, not just bedroom but in a relationship. A female may be strong and independent but she still wants a guy with some grrr. I mean nobody likes a doormat.

They say confidence is sexy. And they’re right. It’s not just confidence about the way you look but confidence in the things you do. The trick is doing it without becoming a jackass.

As always stay safe guys, love,

The Honest Bitch 

Thursday, 8 December 2011

Wish List

Everyone seems to be doing their Christmas wish lists. Basically it’s a list of things that want in an ideal partner. So I thought I’d get in on the act with my own list. Not just because I have a massive headache and this takes little to no brain power but because it actually looks like fun. 

Let’s start.

First of all I want a guy who understands Canada is my home and if I’m going to settle down anywhere it’s going to be there. In the land of -40 winters and blowing hot summers.

I want a guy who understands I have loved the Leafs longer than him. And if given the choice I’d much rather watch the Leafs beat the Habs then have mind blowing sex with him.

I want a guy who understands I’m a soccer free zone. You can love it all you want but I don’t want to see or hear it. Soccer can be your dirty little secret.

I want a guy who can make me laugh. I’m the sort of person who can make a joke out of anything. I can be mad as hell on minute and then on the floor the laughing the next. Yes, I am crazy.

I want someone who understands the importance of alone time. I’m an only child so I’m very use to being alone and I like it that way. I’m sure that sounds horrible but I don’t care.

I need a guy who can put me in my place when I’m being a bitch. I’m a strong personality and because of that a lot of guys just “yes dear” me and I hate it. I want a guy who can look at me a say “you’re being a diva, stop!” Not sure I’d listen but it’s worth a try.

I want a guy who can do the above without being a dick.

Most importantly I need a guy who understands my blogging and that it will continue and he may be written about. He needs to just shut up and take it like a man.

Like most people I don’t think my list is asking too much. I think it’s just the right amount of crazy. So come on guys tell me what is on your wish list?

As always stay safe, Love,

The Honest Bitch 

P.S Be sure to go check out Jimmy's Low- maintenance girl wishlist 
Also check out Joel's wish list  so I missed you the first time around 

Saturday, 3 December 2011

Stop Knocking Up Chavs

Lately it seems instead of ending up with nice, sweet, respectable girls all my guys friends are ending up with the first chav they knock up.

It’s starting to drive me crazy. Forgetting the fact I have to be nice to these “women”, I just think almost all of my guy friends can do better and I hate to see them throw away their life’s over misplaced sperm.

I’m not even sure who I’m madder at, the women who trap these guys or my guy friends who are falling for this BS.

There are many ways not to get pregnant, birth control, condoms, vibrator or just keeping your fucking legs shut. They are all very effective so how all these women are catching pregnancy like it’s a disease is beyond me.

Then I have my guy friends who decide since she’s having their baby they have to be with her. Are you stupid? That’s not the way it works! The only person you are responsible for is that child.

It always amazes me how these guys will repeatedly slag off these women and then the second they find out she’s having a baby they’re magically in love. What a load of shit.

You’re not in love, you’re in trouble. Feelings don’t magically appear in the snap of a finger. I'm not sure who’s worse in all of this, the women who aren’t responsible enough to take birth control or the guys go fall for this BS. Grow a back bone already.

Call me old fashion but I thought the idea was to fall in love and get married not to fall in sperm and settle.

Anyway that’s my rant on the matter. Let me know what you think. As always stay safe.


The Honest Bitch 

Thursday, 1 December 2011

Comfort Sex

One of my readers sent me an article from the Huffington post about comfort sex. He wanted to know if it was true that women really did this. I could have answered his question before I read the article; of course women have comfort sex.

I think the article does a good job of explaining what comfort sex is. It’s not mind blowing sex. It’s good sex. That pretty much goes the same every time you’re together. There is nothing life changing or special about it, just solid reliable sex. And the reason it’s called comfort sex is because it releases endorphins and leaves you with a warm and safe feeling afterwards.

All women do this whether they are single or in a relationship. Like chocolate sometimes sex is just what you need (and it’s a lot better for you then the chocolate.)

Bad day, pissed off, broke a nail, boss is being a prick or ran into an ex’s new girlfriend are all reasons we turn to comfort sex. It’s a very quick and effective way of turning a frown upside down.

Sex has the magic ability to change our moods and there is nothing wrong with tapping into that power to uplift our sprits when we’re down. Some people pop pills others have orgasms.

As long as what you’re doing doesn’t leave you feeling worse in the morning in book it’s all a good thing. Sometimes we all need the comfort that sex can bring.

Stay safe guys, Love

The Honest Bitch

P.S Is there such a thing as comfort making out?