Honest Reaction

I wasn’t going to post a blog today because in the wee hours of the morning my beloved Toronto Leafs clinched a playoff spot for the first time in 9 years. As far as I’m concerned today is a holiday......and possibly a sign of the apocalypse.

But then Mr. X announced over Facebook he’s engaged! In my opinion that calls for a blog.....and tequila not necessarily in that order. Hell I promise not in the order J

My initial reaction was lovely, I said to my friend “I wish them the best; I hope they’re blissfully married for 40 years” it didn’t stay lovely though, I followed that up with “then she runs off with the pool boy, breaking his fucking heart into millions of tiny pieces.” To quote myself exactly I followed that with “cheers”.

I never claimed to be nice, I’m making that clear but I’m honest. And my honest feeling is I hope she emotionally fucks him, the way he fucked me.

I know you’re not meant to say that out loud, I’m sorry but that’s how I feel. I don’t wish him any actual harm, mainly because that shit heals. I want something emotional that way every time he thinks he’s fine, some fucker can pull that scab off and bring it all back up to the surface again.

Now if you’ll excuse me I have some drinking to do, like I said my team made the playoffs and Mr. X is engaged, I’m pretty sure the apocalypse is coming. 

Valentine’s Day

I’m already sick of hearing “Valentine’s Day is coming up!” and before you say anything, no, my dislike towards Valentine’s Day has nothing to do with the fact I’m single. Even when I’m in a relationship I’m not a fan of Valentine’s Day it’s just not my sort of holiday.

“Yucky, yucky mushy shit” (as I’ve been known to call it) has never been my thing, mainly because I don’t have a romantic bone in my body. I love to watch romance in my guilty rom-com pleasure but in reality I wouldn’t be wooed by a candlelight dinner and moonlight dance. That just doesn’t tickle my peach.

Romance is meant to give you an excited feeling, the normal Valentine’s Day protocol give me....a chance to brush up on my faking skills and there is nothing romantic about faking.

I don’t even understand why guys try the normal Valentine’s Day romance act on me. Anybody who knows me knows my love for the colour pink (in everything expect clothing) is the only thing girly about me. So why do they think all that changes just because the calendar reads February 14^th?

You know what my idea of a perfect Valentine’s Day is? Pizza, beer and my beloved Leafs managing to actually win a fucking game! And if by some act of god they do manage to win, an orgasm to finish off the evening.

Before you say it, yes I know I’m weird but you wouldn’t be reading my blog if I was normal now would you? Since I told you about my ideal Valentine’s Day what’s yours? Let me know in the comment box below and as always stay and play safe.

Love,

The Honest Bitch 

xoxoxo

Birthday Island

I've always said the world would be a better place if all my ex boyfriends were shipped off to a small island, then I realised they already live on a small island the only problem is I’m stuck on it too.

It’s kind of strange to think that all my ex boyfriends exist in a space no larger than Lake Ontario. All those headaches, tears and stress all contained in such a relativity small space, it’s crazy.

And great motivation to get the hell off this island. I’ve been here a fairly long time but no matter how long I’m here it’s just not home. It’s true what they same home is where the heart is and my hearts never been here.

It’s my birthday tomorrow and this time of year is always a little hard on me. I want to spend the day with my family and friends I’ve had since kindergarten. But instead I’m spending it what feels like hostile territory.

Luckily over the years I’ve found a good way to deal with birthday homesickness. I spend the day in bed with a pitcher of cocktails watching all 3 mighty ducks movies. Sounds a little pathetic I know but I enjoy it. If I wasn’t a Leafs fan I’d top the day off with some playoff hockey but we all know that’s a pipe dream.

I’m stranded on an island full of my exes and my hockey team beyond sucks...... Guess we all know what I’ll be wishing for as I blow out my candles tomorrow.

So tell me what do you do when you’re home sick? And would the world really be a better place if all your exes were sent to a small island?

As always my dears stay safe and be sure to join me in a drink Thursday (Tequila and Mojitos preferably).

Love Always,

The Honest Bitch 

xoxoxo

Wish List

Everyone seems to be doing their Christmas wish lists. Basically it’s a list of things that want in an ideal partner. So I thought I’d get in on the act with my own list. Not just because I have a massive headache and this takes little to no brain power but because it actually looks like fun. 

Let’s start.

First of all I want a guy who understands Canada is my home and if I’m going to settle down anywhere it’s going to be there. In the land of -40 winters and blowing hot summers.

I want a guy who understands I have loved the Leafs longer than him. And if given the choice I’d much rather watch the Leafs beat the Habs then have mind blowing sex with him.

I want a guy who understands I’m a soccer free zone. You can love it all you want but I don’t want to see or hear it. Soccer can be your dirty little secret.

I want a guy who can make me laugh. I’m the sort of person who can make a joke out of anything. I can be mad as hell on minute and then on the floor the laughing the next. Yes, I am crazy.

I want someone who understands the importance of alone time. I’m an only child so I’m very use to being alone and I like it that way. I’m sure that sounds horrible but I don’t care.

I need a guy who can put me in my place when I’m being a bitch. I’m a strong personality and because of that a lot of guys just “yes dear” me and I hate it. I want a guy who can look at me a say “you’re being a diva, stop!” Not sure I’d listen but it’s worth a try.

I want a guy who can do the above without being a dick.

Most importantly I need a guy who understands my blogging and that it will continue and he may be written about. He needs to just shut up and take it like a man.

Like most people I don’t think my list is asking too much. I think it’s just the right amount of crazy. So come on guys tell me what is on your wish list?

As always stay safe, Love,

The Honest Bitch 
xoxo


P.S Be sure to go check out Jimmy's Low- maintenance girl wishlist 
Also check out Joel's wish list  so I missed you the first time around 

Thanks For A Great Month

Hey Guys,

I just wanted to take this chance to thank you for an amazing month, it may have started off rough but you guys have been amazing, awesome and a little evil, you know who you are (Maxwell)

It’s been a very successful month; my views are way up, almost a 1,000 more views then last month. That just proves that you are all awesome.

Also on the awesome list, Jan B over at (http://blogbiertjuh58.blogspot.com/), who sent me a blog award. Thank you Jan.  Be sure to check out that site.

I just wanted to take this chance to thank you. Here’s to another great month and more importantly here’s to a great hockey season.

Stay safe my dears and Go Leafs Go.

Love,

The Honest Bitch
xoxo

The Down Side

A large percentage of my friends are guys and I love it that way. It cuts way down on the amount of drama in my life. However there is a down side to having mainly male friends.

That down side is they tend to a wee bit protective of me.

When we all go out together, God help any guy who comes up to me. They better have nerves of steel because the guys will do pretty much anything to scare them off.

My favourite move is when they play gay. One of the lads will stork the hand of the guy who is hitting me, ask for their number, whatever they can think of. It’s pretty funny and a little uncomfortable to watch, but it tends to work and scare off the guy.

Most of the time I don’t mind the guys scaring off whoever is hitting on me, there are a lot of ugly guys in this world. But once in a while they’ll scare off a guy who I’m really into. It’s for the best I know because if they can’t handle my friends there is no way on this earth they would be able to handle me but it’s still annoying.

The other downside is.....guys suck at giving advice. They make a great shoulder to cry on but instead of giving advice they want to fix everything. “Oh he hurt you did he? Give me 5 minutes and he’ll be hurting too”. As sweet as that is, it doesn’t really help me and then instead of me venting, I have to prevent them from hurting whoever hurt me. Guess it kind of works to take my mind off it but not very helpful in the long run.

Even in the online world most of the people I talk to regularly are guys. I’m not sure if that’s down to me wanting less drama or because most of the people I talk to online are fellow Leafs fans. The point still stands.

I love the relationships I have with my friends, but pretty much every boyfriend I've had hates it. I’ll ever understand that. I had the friends before the relationship so why they even date me when they have a problem with it, is beyond me.

I know there is a little flirting between the lads and me but it’s completely harmless. Yes some of them will sit with their arm around me but it’s not like I’m fucking any of them. I swear sometimes the guys I date just use it as an excuse to start a fight. And that’s one fight they’ll never win.

I love my male friends dearly I just wish they’d be a little selective when it comes to who they scare off and who they don’t. They really don’t seem to have any rhyme or reason. I guess that's guys for you.

Anyways I’m heading off for the night. Hope you all had a great weekend and as always stay safe.

Love,

The Honest Bitch
xoxoxoxoxo

Turning a negative into a positive

Being a Toronto Maple Leafs fan I was born with thick thin. We are the most chirped and hated team in the NHL and because of this, we learn from a young age to have a sense of humour about things. We know we suck and half the chirping you hear about the Leafs are from other Leafs fan. And might I say our chirps are more original and funny then ones by other teams. The Maple Leafs last won Lord Stanley’s cup in 1967. That was before man walk on the moon. Here’s one for you that was before the 911 emergency service started. Hell Canada wasn’t even a hundred years old yet. Because of these horrible facts Leafs fans are experts in turning negatives into positives. Whether it just a joke that makes people smile (throwing waffles) or just enjoy the little victory like a good hit or great fight.

This is one of those hockey lessons that translates well into your day to day life, things may suck but there‘s still something positive you can take from it.

I’m not a positive person in general, my mind set isn’t “it’s raining....well the flowers will get watered”. My mind set is more “fuck my jeans are going to get wet.” However when it comes to relationships or work I like to forget the feelings and the tears and just hold on to the lessons. There is no use beating yourself up about things you can’t change but if you learned a lesson and are able to successfully apply that lesson in the future. It’s been worth it.

You may have gotten hurt once, but the lesson you learned from it will prevent you getting hurt again. So if 1 heartache can prevents 5 more....I think the lesson paid for its self. You may completely hate someone for what they’ve done, that my dear friend is motivation. Hate isn’t a negative thing if you do positive with it.

I’m heading off guys. I hope your 2011 has started off well. Remember 2011 it’s not rocket science.

Love Always

The Honest Bitch
xoxoxoxo

Happy Halloween!

Good Evening,

Happy Halloween! October 31 – November 1st is said to the point at which the sprits are closet and able to communicate most easily the living. Not many people know this but it’s actually November 1st that’s the hunted day. The history is that people use to dress up on All Hallows' Eve to ward off any harmful sprits from visiting them on All saints day (November 1s) when the sprits are said to be able to reach through from the other world.

I’m not sure if I truly believe in ghosts but for one night a year it’s fun to pretend and just be scared. What other time of year can you be whoever you want to be? Hunted house are my favourite part of Halloween. Sadly England doesn’t really understand how to them. There is nothing like being scared out of skin and running away from a man with a chainsaw. I have some awesome memories from hunted houses over the years.

In other news, my op has been moved forward to November 2nd and my mother operation is now on the 9th. I’m not really worried about my operation I’ve had the same thing done a lot of times now. But I am freaking out about my mom’s, I think she’s going to die. It was a close call last time she was in, ok this is different but I’m really worried. I don’t want to think too much about of I’ll end up crying.

I just wanted to take a chance to thank two very cool people, Jason and Neal. Jason is someone that always knows just what to say to make me feel better and I’m very thankful to have someone that cares for me that much, Even if he hits on me a lot. The other person is Neal and well Neal may be the funniest guy around. He always managed to make me smile, he’s always there to talk to or just listen. He’s also a fellow Leafs fan so that’s always a bonus

Speaking of The Leafs, we lost two shutouts in a round. It has been122 minutes and 24 seconds of game time since the Leafs last scored a goal. The Leafs started this season strong but now they’re sitting in 18th place in the NHL. This season is early put I’m starting to worry that 30th place has own name written all over it.

Did you see Colton Orr’s pink skates tonight? I’m going to post a picture for you. He sported them for Hockey Fights Cancer and you can’t help but feel respect for this tough guy. He may be a fight on the ice but tonight he showed us he’s a good guy.

Anyways it’s now 5am or actually 6 because they clocks went back. Enjoy your extra hours in bed UK people.

Love you

The Honest Bitch

xxxxx

Looking back

Hey Dolls,

It’s Thursday night and I’m home alone doing some thinking, about decisions I’ve made and people I’ve chosen to date. The list of these occupations is sad at best. I always pick the wrong guys, for the wrong reasons.

I’m single because I decided to break the pattern of me dating guys who are clearly losers. I also really couldn’t stomach getting hurt again. There is only so many times a person can bounce back from being squashed before they just stay flatted.

It’s said you only get two great loves and I’ve had both mine, I don’t know if that means I’m destined to spend my life alone with a million cats or if I’m just special and will have more than two great loves that shaped and change me. I guess knowing at my age I’m out of the normal amount of chances to find love means I’ll just have to be enough for me. I’ll have to catch myself when I fall, I’ll have to be the understanding person who says it’s ok to mess up and I’ll have to look after myself and give myself all the love I can because there is no grantees there’s a Mr. Right out there for me.

I know the tone of this is a little sad and not my normal playful self but sometimes it’s important to take a look back at where you’ve come from so you can see where it is you’re going.

In better news the Leafs looked very good in last night’s game. There might be a little hope for them making the playoffs this year. Fingers crossed.

Anyways dolls I’m off to bed. Sweet dreams and as always, stay out of trouble.

Love Always

Queen Bee x x x x x x
(The Honest Bitch)