Lesson Learned

While researching an upcoming blog I came across a lot of ridiculous dating rules and my first response was “if you have to implement any special rules in a relationship, the relationship isn’t worth it.”

It seems completely logical, if you can’t make a relationship work with common decency, it’s just not meant to be, you shouldn’t need stupid little rules to make it work.

As logical as this seems to me now, this was one lesson I had to learn.

A few years back when I was dating The Grinch, I put in place the “teddy clause”.  This was a rule that stated every time he messed up and made me cry he had to buy me a teddy bear.

My thought behind it was if he had to send money and go to girly places to buy teddy bears every time he messed up he might change his attitude. Kind of like a swear jar with teddy bears.

The rule was pretty much completely ineffective. I ended up with a lot of lovely teddy bears and he ended up still being a dick.

Looking back now, it’s more than clear he didn’t give a flying fuck about how his actions were affecting me. What I should have done in hindsight is dump his sorry fuck-wit ass and moved on to bigger and better things.

Nobody needs people like that in their life’s, it’s not worth that headaches and stress. Life is too short to deal with assholes.

I like to try and take something positive from all my relationships even if it’s just a lesson learned and by me sharing these lessons with you guys hopefully you won’t make my mistakes. 

So what other relationship lessons have you guys learned? Let me know in the comment box below. And as always stay and play safe.

Love,

The Honest Bitch 

xoxoxo

Mouth Hell

I want to start by apologizing for being a bad blogger. I took last weekend off for Thanksgiving and then this weekend I missed because, well, I looked like the elephant man and wasn't feeling too hot because of that.

This past week I’ve been in mouth hell.

Wednesday I had an hour long dentist appointment to have a crown done because I broke a tooth eating a bowl of fruit loops (I kid you not; I broke a tooth eating cereal). I don’t know if you’ve ever had a crown done but it’s not fun. They take like 4 different types of molds and it’s just a lot of stuff that makes you want to bite the dentist. Plus you’re frozen and I hate that.

Once I was home and the freezing had worn off, I discovered my bite felt off and I mean way off. It feels like the crown is a foot too high. I was also in a fair bit of pain because the molding trays pissed off my wisdom teeth. I decided to just suck it up and hope things would settle after a few days........They didn’t.

My wisdom tooth decided it hated me and got itself infected. And I’m not talking a little infected, I’m talking couldn’t open my open, swollen face, sore throat, ear ache and feeling sick infected. I spent most of the weekend looking like I escaped a freak show.

Thankfully I’m feeling a little better now. My ear and mouth still hurt but I’m looking a lot less post boxing matchy. Saying that my bite is still off and every time I chew on the crown side it feels like I’m chewing on tin-foil.

It’s not much fun but I’m still not ready to give in a go back to the dentist. Why you ask? Because this sucks, but it sucks a lot less then the nightmare that was having my lower right wisdom tooth pulled.

Here’s the short version of that story; I went to the emergency dentist because my right upper wisdom tooth hurt like hell and my jaw was swollen. The dentist decided to pull my lower wisdom tooth because “it’s easier” and “should help”. The dumb bitch then struggled to freeze the area, once she did, I then spent and an hour in the chair while her assistant held my head and the dentist pulled.  

I still have nightmares about the whole thing so needless to say my other 3 wisdom teeth are staying where they are. Maybe that’s why most people get all 4 pulled at once. I’ve never been one to do things the easy way.

So what wisdom teeth stories do you guys have? Who knows maybe it’ll make me or someone else feel a little better. And as always my dears stay and play safe.

Love,

The Honest Bitch

xoxoxo 

Happy Thanksgiving

Normally I spend this holiday thinking about all my friends and family back home that I miss dearly and am very thankful to still have in my life. It’s a hard holiday to spend on the other side of the planet away from the people you care most about.

Despite that, I thought in the spirit of Thanksgiving I’d take a few minutes to think of some of the things I’m thankful for on this side of the planet.

I’m thankful for the experiences I’ve been able to have here which I wouldn’t have had back home. England is full of history and I’ve been able to learn and experience it here rather than reading about it in some book.

I’m thankful you finish school here at the age of 16. My learning style has always been more hands on, so I’ve always sucked at tests. I can’t tell you what I know but I can sure as hell show you. So I’m thankful to have gone to college here where my work was able to speak for itself.

I’m actually thankful for all the idiots who have crossed my path while I’ve been over here. They have made me stronger and more certain of where I stand of things, my beliefs, what’s right and wrong. Being here has given me the chance to figure these things out for myself.

The other reason I’m thankful for all those idiots is because without them I wouldn’t be sat here blogging now. And I would have missed out on chatting and getting to know some really awesome people.

I am also, of course, thankful for my readers. You guys bring a lot of perceptive to what I write about and reminder me there is some good left out there. Plus if it wasn’t for you guys, I’d just be some crazy person talking to herself.

So that's what I’m thankful for this Thanksgiving, what are you guys thankful for? Let me know in the comment box below. And as always have a great day and stay safe.

Happy Thanksgiving, Gobble, Gobble,

Love,

The Honest Bitch

xoxoxo 

Don't Wake This Bitch Up

The male brain or lack thereof astonishes me sometimes.

On what planet does calling someone who is already mad at you, in the middle of the night and waking them up, sound like a good idea?

I tell you on what planet, none! Nobody likes being woken up in the middle of the night, FACT! And when the jackass waking you up is someone you don’t want anything to do with it’s made a million times worse.

I know men can be a little inept when it comes to dealing with women but this isn’t so much a women thing as it is a logic thing.

You can’t make someone forgive you by pissing them off more. That’s not how the world works.

The amount of men who have pulled this bullshit on me is unreal and after someone tried this again on me last night I feel the need to let it be known this is unacceptable behavior  You aren’t going to win anyone back by being an inconsiderate asshole.

I actually make a point to blocking the numbers of guys who have done this to me. It’s just rude and pushy. Who are they to say they’re more important than my sleep? If you’re trying to get back in my good graces putting your needs above mine is a pretty shitting way of doing so.

 I’m sure I’m not alone in liking my communication with people I’m no longer care for to be done during business hours. When I’m already in the most people are idiots mindset. I don’t want that crap flittering into my down time. That’s my time to do what I wish with whoever I wish.

So you tell me am I over reacting or is waking someone up in the middle of the night for your own selfish reasons crossing the line? And how do you handle being woken up by idiots from your past. Let me know in the comment box below. And as always stay and play safe.

Love,

The Honest Bitch 
xoxo

Brain Mouth Disconnect

I’m not a people person at the best of times, shocking I know coming from someone who has worked in customer services. But I’m an only child and because of that my ability to handle people’s BS is limited. Unless of course I’m being paid, it’s amazing how a paycheck makes people seems less idiotic.

My friends have been commenting a lot recently about me being slightly more “evil” than normal. My ability to play nice seems to have gone on an extended holiday without informing anyone. It’s like my brain has just given up on trying to controlling my mouth.

The amount of times I’ve heard “you can’t say that” over the past few weeks is ridiculous. You’d think by now they’d understand clearly I can say that because I did.

Some of my friends think the reason I’m currently breaking the bitch scale is because I need to get laid. I hate to tell them but sex or lack thereof isn’t my problem, it’s a lot simpler than that.

The problem is the NHL took my damn hockey away. I’m a Canadian with no hockey; there aren’t many problems bigger than that. People think Canadians are kind and well mannered.  Ha, take away our hockey and see how well mannered we are.

At least for me hockey is a release. Well more so the hockey fights. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve picture Orr beating the shit out of someone who’s been riding my last nerve. God help everyone if the hockey season gets totally cancelled, I’ll have to start walking around with a hockey stick beating pests up myself.

Actually even if they end the lockout that sounds like a lot fun almost as much fun as ramming a shopping cart into an asshole who standing there blocking the whole damn aisle.

Ok maybe I’m a little more bitchy then normal right now. So since I don’t want to go to jail for beating someone to death with a hockey stick what releases do you guys have? Let me know in the comment box below. And as always stay and play safe.

Love,

The Honest Bitch

xoxoxo 

That Cures That

I don’t think of myself as a shallow person, I mean anyone whose taken one look at my exes could tell you that but once in a while something happens that makes me question that statement.

I had one of those moments yesterday when someone I use to have a HUGE crush on posted a recent picture of himself on Facebook. The second his picture hit my screen my immediate reaction was “well that cures that crush”.

Almost as soon as the words left my mouth I started to feel guilty for having such a shallow reaction. He is a lovely guy who any girl would be lucky to have, with that being said.... I’ll pass.

On the bright side even though my reaction makes me a horrible person at least it proves I had no real feelings for him. My love/sex life tends to follow the saying “love is blind but lust has 20/20 vision.”

In other words the guys I date tend to be descendants of Frankenstein and my meaningless fun has all been extremely drool worthy. Maybe I should work on swopping those two around.

But either way it appears I have discovered the cure for a long term crush. Who knew it would be as simple as an extremely unflattering Facebook picture (now if I can just get Mr. X to upload one I’d be set.)

So what crush cures do you guys have and what saying sums up your love/sex life? Let me know in the comment box below. And as always stay, and play safe.

Love,

The Honest Bitch
xoxo

Cautionary Tale

I’m sure you guys remember me telling you about my Internet spite dating which I’ve now decided to put on the back burner because, in all honestly if that’s what’s available, I’m glad I’m single.

The only non-weirdo on there was a guy named Mike I went to college with and I didn’t need a dating site to introduce me to someone I already knew. Also despite what the site had to say, we’re not a match. He’s a great guy but neither of us are interested.

Back to the internet dating, I told you guys about a lot of the guys on their however I didn’t tell you about one guy, I’m going to call Adam because well that’s his name.

He was a few years younger than me and didn’t live locally, however he was moving down here to go to university in just a few weeks. He said he was only on the dating site to try and met some people before he moved. He wasn’t my type at all but since he was looking for friends rather than a relationship I didn’t mind.

Everything started off fine, he came across a little overly keen but I didn’t really think too much of it. I should have. Because over the next 2 weeks Adam sent me a ridiculous amount of messages, I’m talking well over a thousand messages. He was becoming clingy and needy and if he saw I was online on the dating site, he turned into a PMSing little whiny ass girl and this was all before I had even met him in person.

Then he sent me this message, “Did you ever really want to meet me? Were you ever interested?”

That is what I call a “Game Over” message. That is the point where you’d have to lack any IQ at all not to walk away.

We had been chatting 3 weeks at the most when he sent that message. For most of that time we didn’t even live in the same city. You’d have to be stupid to meet a guy after that. This story has evening news written all over it.

And that’s like my only goal in life, not to end up on the evening news as one of those cautionary stories.

So what do you guys think am I over reacting or am I right to block and delete this weirdo, let me know in the comment box below. And while you’re at it, tell me you’re weirdo stories I’d love to hear them.

As always, stay and play safe, love,

The Honest Bitch 
xoxox