Monday 3 December 2012

Christmas Lunch Hell

Later this week I’m going to a Christmas lunch with my step dad’s mom and my mom which isn’t my idea of a good time but it’s not the end of the world. Then today it was sprung on me that my step dad (who isn’t going to the lunch) invited his brother and wife to join us. I’m not impressed.

I’m dreading the “isn’t it about time you get married and start having kids?” conversation. It wouldn’t be so bad if they were asking because I’m in a long term relationship but that’s not why they’re asking. They’re asking because they’re kids who are both younger than me are married and their eldest who is 23 has two children.

They always say it like what their kids have done is such an accomplishment. Since when is getting knocked up at 18 by mistake, then a year later being pursued into marring your baby daddy and then a couple years later having another unplanned baby while being financially unstable and working a low paying job, an accomplishment?

Personally I think the real accomplishment is being 25 and not popping out kids I can’t afford but that’s just me and well.......logic.

“But don’t you want to get married?” They make it sounds like I’m a freaking old maid. I’m 25 not a 125. Just because their kids got married at a young age to people they weren’t dating all that long doesn’t make it right.

I’ll get married when I’m good and ready...maybe.

“You’re so good with kids, you should have some.” Once again I’m 25!!! My biological clock isn’t ticking yet. I have a good 15 childbearing years left; I have plenty of time before I need to start worrying about this stuff.

Not to mention the fact I need a guy and his sperm before I can even start to think about that stuff. Marriage, mortgage, kids in that order is the plan. But before any of that can happen I have to find a guy I don’t want to murder. (And I will personally punch anyone in the face who even suggests Mr. X but that’s a rant for another day).

I’ll never understand why anyone would want to push me into get married off. I’m happy just being me and taking my time, the only thing making me unhappy is people trying to tell me what to do with MY life. Last time I check choosing not to be a statistic is a good thing. You’d never fucking know that in that family.

So what do you dread most about spending time with your extended family? Let me know in the comment box below. And as always stay and play safe.


The Honest Bitch 


  1. "Isn’t it about time you get married and start having kids?" - Worst. Conversation. Ever.

  2. I am not being lazy here but I would have to say that you pretty much summed up my exact nightmare! The exact words I hate are "Isn't it time to settle?" Last time I checked, I am only 25, I don't have - much - cellulite yet and my boobs are still firm - small but firm nonetheless - so why am I supposed to settle? Why do I have to lower my standards and force myself into a relationship just so I can fit the mold or as you say so well be part of the statistics?

  3. Honest B, the longer you wait the worse it gets. I'm 41 and my mother still wants to know when I am going to get married and have kids. Sometimes I can even see the panic in her eyes. It never fails at a family function, that at least three distant relatives ask me if I have found misses right yet.
    My advice (if you want unsolicited advice from a man) is to smile and nod, say that it just may happen anytime... And then go on living life just the way you want to.
    Thanks for the chuckle.