Showing posts with label Purity Rings. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Purity Rings. Show all posts

Wednesday 7 October 2015

Purity Rings Revisited

I’ve had a lot of requests lately to revisit my purity ring posts now that I’m apparently “older and wiser and more mature.” Even funnier than the idea that I’m either wiser or more mature is occasionally add-on of “less sin filled”. I take that one as a personal insult… or maybe a challenge.

I’ve given the idea of rewriting these posts a lot of thought, a lot more thought than I normally give a post, and I’ve decided against it. Not because of the amount of hate these posts get (which for the record is a lot) but because I whole hearted agree with both the original post I wrote back in 2011 and the follow up I did in 2012. (Both posts are link in case you want to read them.)

Both posts were well researched, particularly my 2012 one, which was basically a giant screw you to the insane amount of alleged Christians who had and continue to message me to this day telling me I’m wrong, a horrible human and I’m going to hell.

The facts, the numbers and studies haven’t changed; purity rings do not work and those who take the pledge are substantially more likely to practice unsafe sex.

TV shows like Teen Mon and 16 and Pregnant, have actually had a bigger impact on both teens waiting to have sex and practicing safe sex than these magical silver rings that are meant to keep teen legs closed in the name of God have ever had.

If anything in the 4 years since I posted my original blog, scientific studies have proven these facts more definitively and me rewriting my post won’t change that. As much as you may disagree, facts are facts.

I won’t leave you with a question of the blog this time, I shall just open the floor up to you, leave your thoughts and opinion on the matter in comment box below. And as always stay, and play, safe.

Love,

The Honest Bitch 
xoxoxo

Wednesday 9 May 2012

Purity Rings Clarified

I've been receiving a lot of shit over the opinions I voiced in a blog about purity rings. Since I stand by my opinion I thought I’d write another blog to rebut some of the comments and emails.

 Let me start this the same way I started the last blog and hopefully this time people will actually read it. I DO NOT HAVE A PROBLEM WITH PEOPLE WHO WAIT TILL MARRIAGE TO HAVE SEX. It’s not my choice but to each their own.

My problem is with purity rings, virginity pledges and abstinence only teaching. NOT the actual act of waiting to have sex.

A lot of the places who promote and encourage purity rings and virginity pledges (which by the way are one in the same) only teach and encourage the teaching of only abstinence.

That is a huge problem, make even worse by the fact report after report have found abstinence only teaching does not result in abstinence only behaviour.

Teenager need to be educated in how to protect themselves whether they plan on waiting or not. Too much information never hurt anyone.

Someone commented on my last blog misquoting me saying I said people with purity rings are more likely to get STD’s. What I actually said is they’re more likely to practice unsafe sex. And I was and am right about that.

There have been many reports published in Pediatrics alone finding that kids who take virginity pledges not only have sex at the same rates as non pledge takes but are also less likely to practice safe sex.

The same journal also publish a report saying “teaching abstinence but not birth control makes it more likely that once a teenagers initiate sexual activity they will have unsafe sex and contract sexually transmitted diseases.” Not my words the words of Dr. S Paige Hertweck. That right The Honest Bitch actually does research.

And just to drive home my point because I like being right there are also several studies published in the journal Sexuality Research and Social Policy finding that abstinence only and not until marriage sex education programs do not delay the onset of sexual activity and provides inaccurate information about condoms.

So I stand by my opinion that purity rings are stupid and don’t work and in many cases attach a stigma to sex, which shames and guilts teens into having unsafe sex. All a purity ring is good for is being a glorified fashion accessory.

You’re free to believe whatever you want and so am I. I just happen to believe in comprehensive sex education and making educated decisions.

Now that’s cleared up I have a few more things I’d like to say to some of the commenters. Don’t tell me to respect your opinions when you clearly not respect mine because that just makes you a hypocrite.

I have no problem discussing my views like adults, that’s why I blog but when you come at me like a crazy person I will tell you wear to shove it, in a less GP way.

Also thanks to those of you who were concerned about my soul but I won’t be taking sex advice from virgins, it’s kind of like taking automotive advice from a florist it’s just not a smart policy.

I would ask you tell me what you think on the matter but something tells me you’ll do that anyways.

As always my dears play safe.

Love,

The Honest Bitch
xoxoxo

Thursday 22 September 2011

Born Again Virgins

I recently did a blog about purity rings, in that blog I touch on “born again virgins” and you guys had a lot to say on the matter so I figured I may as well turn it into a blog of its own.

Once again I have nothing against people who decided not to have sex before marriage. My problem is with the title and the lengths some people go to.

The title is stupid, you’re not a “born again virgin”, you’re playing hard to get. Really hard to get, a ring and “I do” hard to get but it’s not like you’re nun or anything.

You may regret your first but you don’t get a do over. It doesn’t work like that. Once a penis cuts the ribbon you can’t superglue it back together.

No amount of praying will grow your hymen. Some women understand that and go to extreme lengths and have something called a hymenorrhaphy. Basically they have their hymen reconstructed. Women who go that far clearly have more money than brains. Why would anyone do that? Was the feeling of your hymen ripping the first time that enjoyable? That’s just plain old crazy.

I’ll never understand why they need a title anyways. No one cares what is or has entered and left your vagina. If you believe you made a mistake by having sex unmarried why on earth would you give it a title and draw attention to that mistake? It just doesn’t make any sense in my books.

The term was coined by fundamentalist Christians who put a lot of importance on stay pure. That’s all well and good but they also teach that God forgives and that forgiveness makes you pure again. It’s kind of like forgive and forget. He’ll forgive you and not hold it against you but he still knows you had sex.

He also knows you asked for forgiveness. He’s like Santa Clause; he knows when you’ve been good or bad so if he knows, why the hell does the rest of world have to know. What God’s forgives isn’t good enough for you; you need a special title too? You’re not a “born again virgin” you’re wannabe virgin and that’s pathetic.

I’d also like to point out, nobody in their right mind chooses to give up sex; sex chooses to give up you. And instead of admitting you’re in a dry spell, you play the “born again virgin” card. Everyone sees through that. We all know what it really means. So give it up.

I thought we were meant to embrace our mistake, that’s how we learn and grow as people. “Born again virgin” is a copout. No matter how many birthday candles you wish on you’re not a virgin.  You’re someone who feels they made a mistake by having sex before marriage. That is fine. But put on your big girl panties, drop the stupid the title and own it.

Anyways that’s my rant on the matter why do you guys think?

Stay safe, Love,

The Honest Bitch
xoxoxo

Saturday 10 September 2011

Purity Rings

I recently got into a big debate about purity rings. I’m categorically against them; they’re just a stupid idea that leads to stupid and reckless decisions.

Let me start by saying I have nothing against people who wait to have sex until marriage, I wouldn’t buy a car without test driving it but each to their own. My problem is with that stupid silver ring.

The people who wear these rings make a pledge to God to remain abstinence until they get married. By placing that ring on their finger, they’re attaching a stigma to sex. Which is pretty much the worst thing you can do, these people are too ashamed and guilty to seek advice on sexual health issues.

Furthermore after causing teenagers to feel too ashamed and guiltily to seek advice, these abstinence groups don’t teach anything more than abstinence putting these kids in unnecessary risk for STD’s and pregnancy. Everyone should know about safe sex whether they plan to use that information or not.

Case studies have proven teenagers who wear purity rings are just as likely to have premarital sex as teenagers who don’t, but they’re substantially less likely to wear a condom or use any other type of birth control.

These rings just don’t work and all it does is shame and guilt teens into having unsafe sex.

Unless you accompany a purity ring with a chastity belt it’s not going to stop anyone who having sex. So stop pretending it will. Educate teens so they can make informed and smart decisions. And if they decided to have sex they’ll know how to protect themselves and we won’t have to watch show like “teen mom” and “16 and pregnant” anymore.

One of the other things this person ask is if women for aren’t virgins should wear white. Personally I don’t think the whole wedding party should be able to tell the brides sexual history based on her dress. But that’s just me. The person said it’s like wearing a cap and gown at graduation. You should only wear it if you put the work in. I call bullshit. You stay a virgin or “pure” because its god will not so you can wear white. Plus women will do and wear whatever they want, that’s just a fact of life. There is no point caring if it’s right or wrong because she’s going to do it anyways.

The other issue that came up in this conversation was the idea of born again virgins. This may be the most stupid idea ever, even more stupid then the ring. Dear world, once it’s gone, it’s gone.......deal with it. This is why you should be smart and educated before you start having sex so you don’t became some idiot who thinks they can think back their virginity. News Flash Einstein it’s does work like that. That’s like me saying if I wish real hard I’ll become the tooth fairy.

Anyways I'm off to wish I was the tooth fairy and that Elmo was president of the United States. As always stay and play safe guys.

Love,

The Honest Bitch
xoxoxoxo