The Departure Of Hank

So Hank has been returned to his natural habitat and I’m actually a little sad about it. I may have even shed a tear or two on the way home, which is completely ridiculous given the fact I didn’t even cry when the supervisor left. But for whatever reason I’m genuinely saddened by his departure.

Part of it is selfish, with him gone, my development fundamentally ceases and that’s horrifying to me. Part of the reason I love my job is the challenge and without the ability to grow to meet the challenges, what’s the point. I may as well just stay in bed.

The other part of it is I really like Hank, he is the grumpiest, sharped tongue asshole you’ll meet. But he’s genuine. Don’t get me wrong, he’s also sweet, super funny and a lot of fun to be around, but what I respect most is there’s nothing fake about him. He’s just unashamedly him and that’s awesome. He’s the sort of person I like to spend my time with in the real world. So it was nice to have someone like that in my work life too, it made work seem less flying knifey.  

I’m pretty sure the gay husband is going to miss him too. He was on a one man mission to marry us off. He wholeheartedly believes Hank may be the only man on the planet that has the ability to deal with me at my worse. I take a little offense to that, but I can’t disagree that Hank seemed to manage my moods effortlessly. That poor boy saw me at the worse I’ve been in years and came off completely unscathed. There are many that wouldn’t believe that to be possible.

I like to give credit where credit is due and that man is definitely special, but I hate to pop the gay husband’s bubble but I can’t foresee anything happening there. First of all, I’m not his type, second, I’ve never dated anybody younger than me and third of all, I occasionally enjoy sex and his penis is currently an investment banker.

And on that note, I shall leave you wonderful people with this question; why do people in relationships try to marry off their single friends? Let me know your thoughts in the comment box below and as always stay and play safe.

Love,

The Honest Bitch 
xoxoxoxo

Chicken Missing

It’s been about a year since Chicken Man and I have been in the same country at the same time and I’m really missing him. I miss the easiness of our relationship, I miss that he could always make me feel better without even trying and I really miss well.....his penis, ok, I said it, I miss his penis. I swear to god that thing was built for me.

As fond as I am of his penis, it’s his ability to make me feel better I’m missing right now. I miss how when one of us was sick we’d spend all day in bed together watching films you couldn’t pay most men to watch. He loved theatre so we’d watch so The Phantom of the Opera, Cats, or Les Miserables. Like I said, stuff you couldn’t pay most guys to wouldn’t watch.

It always makes me laugh that when people see Chicken Man they think he’s some tough guy, with his knuckles tattooed and all that (which for the record isn’t my type at all) but in reality he’s just this funny, teddy bear who is extremely well traveled and versed in the arts. Saying that I wouldn’t want to cross him, I remember his reaction when it came to light The Grinch cheated on me, that guy is so lucky I beat him up.

 It’s a running joke with my friends that leave it to me to date a “bad boy” (air quotes are needed) that is so well traveled and versed in the arts. Most are into drugs or drinking mines into musical theatre, I never do anything the normal way J

Thank you guys for listening to rumblings I actually feel a lot better now, so what are your “bad boy” or “bad girl” (I’m sure I have some male readers) dating experiences? Let me know in the comment box below. And as always stay and play safe.

Love,

The Honest Bitch 

xoxoxo