Am I the only one who finds themselves occasionally doing
things that they know are a bad idea?
It seems every few years, my brain enters a fuck it mode
where it understands what it’s thinking is a horrible idea but rationalizes it
with “why not? It’s a little bit of fun and if it all goes wrong, is it really
going to make things that much worse?” And for whatever reason, sooner or later
the rest of me buys that rational and goes along for the ride. And shock horror
it pretty much always ends badly.
I think the last time my brain entered that mode was when I
agreed to go out with that guy I was telling you about in my “Past Rumour”
post. I knew it was horror idea, even though he had left, we had a lot of
friends in common and I just knew it wasn’t smart. But, I thought “what’s the
worse that is going to happen”, and now ex co-workers know initiate details
about my sex life.
The problem I’m having is my brain is in the middle of one
of those fuck it cycles right now, and I feel like it’s only a matter of time
before I give in and I’m left to clean up the pieces afterwards. Despite
knowing full well this is a horrible, stupid, foolish idea that can only end badly.
I bet you want to know what the bad idea is, don’t you?
After radio silence for almost 2 months TPF (The Penis
Flasher) messaged me the other day while I was at work. In a fairness, I didn’t
really mind, when his mind isn’t on his penis he’s easy to talk to and we have
a bit of a laugh. The problem is his mind doesn’t stay off his penis for long and
this was no exception.
The shorten version of events is he wanted to meet up at
06:30 after I finished work but before he started for “have some fun”. Now crazy
brain or not, this wasn’t happening and I’ll explain why.
Let’s start with the fact I’m not the easy, I take a little
wooing…or at least a few drinks. I’m not about to meet up with anyone in broad
day and just fuck them, that isn’t my style.
Now let’s talk about the time frame. This is a guy I haven’t
kissed, haven’t touched, haven’t spent any time with outside of work, and he’s
allocated a 30 minute window at best…I don’t want to sleep with anybody whose start to finish is 30 minutes or less, I’m after an orgasm not a pizza.
With that said, at some point I predict I will give in and
the "fuck it" side of my brain will win and I’ll tell you why. There is definitely
no relationship to be had there, so in a way makes it’s safe. I won’t be working at
the same location as him soon so if things go bad, I don’t have to see him. And
as much as my brain knows better, he makes me laugh and we all know funny guys
have a habit of clouding my better judgement.
That said, he breaks one of my golden rules of safe sex,
which we know is condoms, birth control and a reasonable chance the guy I'm sleeping with is shooting blanks. TPF has a kid, which by all rights should disqualify
him, but given how bad an idea this is, hell what’s an another one.
Anyways, I am going to go and get drunk because clearly
sober me is making bad life choices and at least if I’m drunk I can’t drive making
it much harder to act on those choices. But before I go I have this question for
you; why do we do thing that we know will end badly? Let me know in the comment
box below. And as always, stay and play safe.
Love,
The Honest Bitch
xoxo
