I guess I should
start by explaining my disappearing act. There isn’t actually much to tell. I
was order by my doctor to take a few weeks off and relax.
He gave me this
order, well; he actually didn’t give it to me, he gave it to my mom. Yes that’s
right my mom. The doctor went over my head and gave it to my mom leaving me no
choice in the matter.
He gave the order for
two main reasons. The first is since my MRI I’ve been having panic attacks.
Which my doctor says is due to stress. 18 doctors appointment in the first 4
months of 2012 will do that to a person. The second reason was my back was
spasming and I had an appointment with a new doctor coming up. It was very
likely at that first appointment he was going to do injections in my back which
apparently is very hard to do when the back is spasming.
At first I wasn't a fan
of these orders, I had things I needed to do and nobody was letting me do them.
My mom actually went so far as to, hide my netbook and steal my PC keyboard. Charming
I know.
After one final panic
attack it became very clear I was taking this forced holiday whether I liked it
or not and I should stop wasting my energy and just go with it.
I’m weird with panic attacks;
I’m a very sane crazy person. I lay with my back against the wall looking
at my door, because it stops that somebody is going to come up behind me and
stab me feeling. As I’m lying there I’m thinking this is fucking crazy. My room
is on the ground floor and at the front of the house, surely the window would
be my biggest problem not the door. Like I said I’m a sane crazy person.
Despite the fact I
thought I felt fine before my forced holiday I have to admit now my doctor was
right. Even though it took me the best part of my time off to actually relax once
I did, I could really feel the difference and as an added plus was my neck and
back weren’t feeling so tight.
Or at least they
weren’t until I met my new doctors yesterday, who I can safely say beat the
living shit out of my back. I guess the upside is they decided, at least for
now, they aren’t going to do any injections. Thank god for that. I’ve been
under that fluoroscope so many times I think my ovaries are starting to glow in
the dark.
After getting double
teamed by two doctors yet again today, and let me add not in the good way, I’ve
been given the green light to end my forced holiday. So I should be resuming my
regular blogging schedule as of....now.
And if you ask me it’s
not a second too soon, I’ve missed blogging. As always my dears stay safe,
Love,
The Honest Bitch
xoxo
Glad u're back, I was googling some insane heartbreaking bs n accidentally stumbled upon ur blog and I have to say reading it help me to smile and for a few minutes forget about my heavy heart which is never a bad thing :-). So looking forward to more moments of honest bitchin truth...
ReplyDelete