To all the men out there, I have a word of advice for you, declaring your love at 3am is NEVER a good idea.
Let’s start with the obvious reason why it’s a horrible idea. Nobody likes being woken up in the middle of the night. And women in particular HATE IT. You’re making us get out of bed in the middle of the night; half asleep, looking like shit, in our pyjamas with no makeup on so we’re instantly crabby.
The other obvious problem is we don’t believe a single word you have to say at that hour. Nothing intelligent and well thought out comes out of anyone’s mouth at 3am. Not to mention the fact I don’t think anyone has ever declared their love at 3am sober. Women don’t care what the beer has to say ever, and saying it at 3am just annoys us farther.
I only bring this problem up because Friday night someone tried this bullshit on me and it’s now Sunday and I’m still irritated by it.
At 3am I was woken up by a knocking at my window. I tried to go back to sleep but it continued so I was given no choice but to get up. There was a drunken guy I haven’t spend any real time with in at least 7 years.
I decided to hear him out because it was clear I wasn’t getting any more sleep otherwise. He was rambling on about wanting a relationship and some other crap I wasn’t awake enough to take in.
He went on to tell me the he’d been drinking (duh) and that Tweedle Dumb and Tweedle Dumber had magically come across my blog and told him from what they saw I have feelings for him too.
Since I had no fucking clue what he or they were talking about I logged on to my blog to figure it out. I’d like to go on record that I still don’t know what they’re talking about. I personally think it’s another case of someone thinking their Mr. X when clearly they’re not. I don’t even have feelings for Mr. X anymore so even that’s logic is flawed.
After he said everything he had to say I kicked him out and tried to get back to sleep. That didn’t happen till 8am which irritated me even more. But I figured that was that and I wouldn’t hear anymore from him.
I was wrong, at 1am last night I got a Facebook message from him asking if he could come over and fuck me. At which point I decided my twitter follower Maxwell was right and I should buy a gun, a pink scary gun.
I’m way too old for this bullshit; it’s not appealing and a massive turn off. But hopefully you guys out there can learn from this guy’s mistake and not pull this crap because if you do the only thing you’ll be spending the night with is your hand.
As always my dears stay safe. Love,
The Honest Bitch