Wednesday 16 May 2018

Busy Brain

I’m having one those days were my brain is going 100 miles a minute and I’m struggling to keep up with it. I want to sit and write to clear my thoughts however, I took so long off you guys are out of the loop and I’m not sure it will make sense. But, let’s try anyways.

I’m currently on a much-needed holiday from work, and normally by now I’d relax and refreshed, and I am not. I am stuck in a job that is fantastic on paper, but is slowly killing my soul. And where I use to have hopes of it improving, that hope is dead. I feel it may be time to move on however, the benefits are just too good. There is no other company like it. I am stuck.

Also, my old of work husband has popped up out of the blue. Apparently, he’s relocating to my city. I was cool with the idea however he’s either a drama maker or a tease and I can’t work out which.

And last of all its my birthday tomorrow. 31 years old. This birthday is just me ticking closer to the end of the dream of getting married and having a child. That fucking biological clock just keeps marching on.

Anyways, I have things to do, like make ice so I can be drunk tomorrow. But I’ll fill you guys in as we go along.

Love Always, 
The Honest Bitch

Sunday 13 May 2018

Mother's Day

Hey Guys,

I know it’s been a while, and as much as I wanted to write something, and let you guys know what was happening. I just wasn’t ready to face it. And to be honest I am still not. However, the first step in dealing with hard things is accepting they’re real and moving out of denial and for me to that I need to write about it.

My mother is not well. Her kidneys are failing, and we’ve been told she not a candidate for transplant. At the moment her function is at 14% it was at 9% when she was first admitted in the hospital. However, since being home it has improved slightly and is at the moment is holding. She will be starting dialysis soon and then it’s a waiting game. We’ve been told someone people last years with low kidney function, other’s months. Nobody really knows what is going to happen and that’s the hard part.

As most of you know, I am an only child, for most of my life it was just me and mom. As nightmares go I can’t think of anything worse. I may be 30 years old, but I am just not ready to lose my mommy.

As I sit her writing this, it’s Mother’s Day and I think of how strong and selfless my mother is. How even now, despite the fact she’s clearly unwell, she’d never admit it. She’s still powering on and putting everyone else first. And all I can do is have a quiet cry, wondering if this is the last Mother’s Day we’ll have together.

Anyways, like I said it’s Mother’s Day so I need to go clean myself up. Put on a happy face and pretend I’m strong enough to deal with all of this.

I promise I’ll be back soon, now that all of this is out there hopefully it’ll be easier to write.

Love ya all
The Honest Bitch

Friday 9 February 2018

Stressed For No Reason

Can someone explain to me why I feel so stressed and run down?

It’s not been a bad start to 2018; I started the year with a pay raise, I’ve finally been allowed to order my company car and I’ve only worked 5 sets of 4 so far this year, hell I only have 2 more sets before I’m off again. So, what the hell is up with me?

Ok, they are trying to screw with my contract which is a little stressful, but at least at the minute, they are not pushing it so that shouldn’t account for it. My mom has a surgery pending, but that’s still some ways off. I just don’t get why I’m feeling this way.

 I’m starting to wonder if operation be a less shitty human is the reason. I mean it takes a lot to not snap at idiots. And it takes even more to try to swallow the bullshit they feed you. And listen to them whine and moan. Being a nice human it way more work than one would think, and I suck at it and it’s still draining me.

Anyways, I am going to go and rest up before I head back to work to face another week. But before I go, I have this question for you; How do you keep your calm when dealing with assholes? Let me know in the comments below. As always, stay and play safe.

The Honest Bitch

Friday 2 February 2018


I’m not sure why, but 2018 so far seems to be the year of being unmotivated. I just have no go, no drive, no want and clearly that’s a problem. That said It’s not that I’m being unproductive; my “to do” list gets done, I’m not failing anything, I’m just dragging my heels and leaving it all to the last minute and not doing things to my normal standards.

This blog is the prefect example. I am writing this at 6am on the day of my first night shift back. Why? I’ve just had 4 days off. I’ve not done anything major during those 4 days off so why am I now giving up sleep to do something I could and should have already done? What the hell is wrong with me?

I like to end these posts with answers, but I have none. This is one of those posts I write hoping by getting the thought out of my brain something will come to me and if it does I’ll let you know.  But I’ll pass the question on to you lovely people. What do you do to get motivated? Let me know in the comments below. And as always stay and play safe.


The Honest Bitch

Friday 26 January 2018

“You Deserve To Be Single”

The other day I received a comment notification on a post I wrote close to 5 years ago. The post was about how I didn’t need a guy in my life to fill a gap, I didn’t need one to lean on or do things for me. A guy was a bonus not a necessity. A point I still stand by all these year later. This “bright spark” felt the need to reply to a blog half a decade old with “if that’s how you feel, you deserve to be single.”  

“You deserve to be single.” I’m not sure why the sentence is an insult. But, it’s  definitely meant as one. Unlucky for him, I don’t personally see it that way.  However, many do, and that troubles me.

Many people, some of them friends of mine, have made it their career to help others not be single. As if being single is the worst thing that could happen to you. And this mindset, is A. Making a lot of people money and B. non-conducive to a happy life. If you think being single is the end of the world, you’ll make it the end of the world. And that tends to lead to settling and that leads divorce where you're back in the “end of the world” scenario again.

I don’t understand any of this. If you haven’t found that special someone that adds to your life, you deserve to be single. You deserve not to waste your time on some loser, you deserve to be happy within yourself.  I don’t understand why being single is seen as death sentence… It’s kind of the opposite.

Anyways, that’s my thought on the matter. What do you think is “you deserve to be single” is an insult or not? Let me know in the comments below. As always, stay and play safe.


The  Honest Bitch 

Friday 19 January 2018

Why Do Men Think It Is Ok

This is going to be a fairly short post, mainly because I once again left writing it to the last minute and because I want to throw this out there and get your thoughts.

Why do men who are in committed relationships think its ok to tell other women they like them and or ask them out? On what planet does that end well for them?

Many saying come to mind; “Once a cheater, always a cheater,” “A zebra cannot change its stripes, ” “Lie with a dog, get up with fleas.” “What you associate with reflects on you.” All of which boils down to you’d have to be an idiot and think pretty lowly of yourself to reciprocate.

So why do they bother? It only lowers a person’s perception of them. Which means if they are ever single, they have no hope at all.

Anyways, I am going to throw this one out to you. Let me know your thoughts in the comments below and as always, stay, and play safe.


The Honest Bitch 

Friday 12 January 2018

Slow going

Any dream I had of 2018 finally being the year I get life organised is being quickly dashed. This is the second Friday of the year and the seconds Friday I’m writing and posting on the same day. But, I am writing so I guess it’s only a half fail; although I’m not writing the post I planned so maybe a 2/3 fail…. Is that a thing? I guess it is now.

Operation be a less shitty human is going fairly well. I worked with a less favorite colleague last night and I didn’t lose my temper or break a toe or anything. That said, I’m starting think road rage is completely involuntary. It’s as bad as ever and I’m not sure how to stop it without taking up murdering all the idiots on the road.

The plan to get healthy is….. a plan. Progress and changes are happening, however baby steps and until I have a little time off work, it’s going to have to be that way. Change takes time and effort and my work days are too long to really focus and build good habits.

Anyways, I’m going to go and probably get some more sleep. I’m struggling to keep eyes open. But before I go I have this question for you, how do you calm down your road rage? Let me know in the comments below. And as always stay and play safe.


The Honest Bitch