It’s been a long time since we’ve done a drunken blog and I figure
it’s about time we do it again. Allow me to give the normal disclaimer: This
post will be written and edited drunk. Once I have sobered up, this post will
not be touched again. I will of course respond to comment and all that goodness,
but there will be no editing to what has been written. Now that that’s been
said; Let’s drink.
This drunken post is going to be about Steve. Steve is, of
course, the gentleman with the pregnant wife, I’ve been swapping inappropriate messages
with for the past month. Once again, I am fully aware I am going to hell. I am
good with it.
Steve was meant to be safe; he is after all a married man. Workplace
flirting, as a rule, is a great confidence booster. And I’ll admit it, after
everything, I needed it. Not that I was lacking
confidence but, the best way I can describe it is, I have confidence, but it’s
lacking self-assurance. It’s a fragile confidence if you will. I’m not 100%
happy with the way I look at the minute and I’m not totally happy with me, as a
whole either, so bare that in mind as this story goes onwards.
Last night, I was swapping inappropriate messages with Steve,
trying to get, for lack of a better word, a rise out of him, when he got a rise
out of me. I had just sent him a picture that I wasn’t comfortable with, but I
knew he’d like. And, instead of a normal response. He fired back asking for a
different picture, one my insecurity wouldn’t allow. And then he wouldn’t drop
it, he was like a dog with a boner. I didn’t mind so much he asked, but the pressure
was unneeded, and I didn’t like it.
Considering he was meant to be a safe option, it didn’t feel
safe. It didn’t feel good, It felt like I was a teen dating a prick and I am
far too old to be dealing with that shit. And then, of course, he got an attitude
with me because I was upset. Like I’m the bad guy in this. I know a lot of it is my own issues. Which is why I didn't debate any of this with him at the time, but still dude don't be a selfish horn dog.
Anyways, my tequila is not holding its buzz so I am going to
end this here. But before I do, I have this question for you; What do you do
when you’re pushed outside your comfort zone? Shut down? Yell? Let me know in
the comments below and as always, stay and play safe.
Love,
The Honest Bitch
xoxo
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