Aristotle said there are 3 types of friendships; Friendships
of utility, friendships of pleasure and friendships of the good. Personally,
I’m not sure those are the titles I would have gone with, but there are definitely
different type friendships, and each serves a purpose, and each has a time and
place.
I’ve never classed or even thought about my friends in this
way. However, I have noticed recently I’ve been pulling away from certain
people. I’ve been slowly discovering with everything going on in my life,
certain friends just aren’t a good fit for me right now. It’s not that we’ve
fallen out or I dislike them or anything like that. It’s just they aren’t what
I need in my life right now.
My work bestie up in Manchester is the best example of this.
If we were going to classify the friendship it would fall under that “utility” category.
We both serve a purpose to each other. However, right now, I don’t have it in
me to serve that purpose. She phones me, and I know what I’m supposed to say,
but I just don’t want to. I don’t want to play that part right now. It takes so
much energy and I don’t get anything positive from it.
On the flip side of that, when I speak to Steve’s brother Tyler,
who also works for the company, I get something positive from that. For the record,
we have a very different relationship. Tyler reminds me of my drama geek
friends. He is someone I can just be stupid with. We spend our evenings at work
singing at each other down the phone or sending each other ridiculous Snapchat
pictures. There is no worry about how I look or anything like that; it’s just
fun and that’s what I need right now.
When it comes to Steve, that’s where things get complicated.
When he’s himself, it’s all golden. I could happily spend hours just talking to
him. However, recently he’s been prone to some bad moods. I’m not sure whether
works is getting to him or what, but I can’t. They say bad moods are contagious
and I’ve been very susceptible to them recently. If there is a hint of a mood
around me, I seem to catch it. So, when he’s in a mood, for my own sanity I steer
clear.
Then you have the gay husband, who at the moment I am
avoiding. Once again, we haven’t fallen out or anything like that. The issue I
am having with him is different than the others. The problem with him is the
way he looks at me, he has what I call “sad eyes”. He’s treating me differently
and questioning my choices. He’s just not being real with me; it’s as if he
thinks I’m about to break at any moment. I understand he has my best interests at
heart, but I don’t like the way he’s going about it. It’s not what I need and it's definitely
not what I want. I don’t want to live in Candy-coated Sugar Land, I want people
to be real with me, and if it gets too much, like Steve and his moods, I’ll
back off. That’s on me. Fake has never been a thing I do or deal with and it’s
sure as hell is not about to start now.
Anyways, my dears, I am going to go and enjoy what is left
of my day off, but before I go I have this question for you; What do you do to
look after yourself? Let me know in the comments below and as always, stay and
play safe.
Love,
The Honest Bitch
xoxo
