Showing posts with label Advice. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Advice. Show all posts

Monday 4 July 2011

Forgive and Forget

Hey Guys,

Let me start by apologizing for my whininess in my last post. Writing a blog post with a 102 degree fever wasn’t my smartest move but I promised a post and I wasn’t about to let anyone down.

However I’m feeling much better now and I have an absurd concept I’d like to talk about.

“Forgive and forget”

The whole idea of forgiving and forgetting is completely bonkers to me. I’m not against forgiving people so don’t get me wrong. It’s the forgetting part I have a problem with. It’s like that old saying “Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me.”

You're never going to learn from anything if you constantly forgetting. It’s the recipe to becoming a doormat. “Oh he cheated on me” --> forgive and forget --> “he cheated on me” --> forgive and forget --> “he cheated on me” --> forgive and forget! On what planet does that make any sense? It’s the merry-go-round ride to hell.

My common sense would tell me after the first time I had to forgive someone that may this person is trouble and it’s time to find a new friend or boyfriend or whatever. I sure as hell wouldn’t get on the “forgive and forget” marry-go-round.

While writing this I can across something that said forgiving and forgetting can improve your health. But what about your quality of life? Actually a better question is why would you be around that many people who you constantly need to forgive?

I understand once in a blue moon something happens and you need to forgive or not forgive someone. But how many idiots do you have to have around you for it to impact your health. If you have that many fuck-wits around you, you deserve all the health problems you get. Use your brain. Stupid deserves stupid.

Maybe I’m wrong but in my opinion. Forgiving and forgetting is a sure fire way to become a doormat. You need to use your brain and not blindly follow some poorly thought out saying.

I’m heading back to bed. As always stay safe.

Love,

The Honest Bitch

xoxoxoxo

Sunday 26 June 2011

This Needs To Be Said

This needs to be said.....

When you’re constantly breaking up and getting back together, that is NOT a relationship. That is a fuck friend who doesn’t know the rules.

Stop being so naive, he doesn’t love you, he doesn’t miss you, and he sure as hell doesn’t want to make it work, and before you say it, NO, YOUR MAN IS NOT DIFFERENT!

He’s horny. It’s simple.

Stop lying to yourself and more importantly stop making everyone hear about how he’s going to change. You my dear, are nothing but a place for him to rest his penis in.

There is nothing wrong with this per se. Fuck friends are great, but you need to be aware that’s what you are.

So stop the drama and either call a spade a spade or move on with your life. Don’t be stupid and pretend there’s something there when there clearly isn’t. It just makes you look pathetic and meek. Stop making the rest of us look bad and being a disgrace to the female race.

That’s my 2 cents and I’m sure you’ll tell me yours. Love you guys and as always stay safe.

Love,

The Honest Bitch

xoxoxoxo

Thursday 23 June 2011

Are Women More Emotional Then Men?

I asked this question of my Facebook page (www.facebook.com/TheHonestB) a few weeks ago and after reading all the replies I feel inspired to write a post on the matter.

So are women more emotional then men?

Personally I think women and men are equally as emotional as each other. The difference is which emotions we show.

I’ll be the first to admit women are more likely to cry whether it’s over hurt feelings, pain or just because they’re happy (I’ll never understand that). But I also think women are more likely to hide certain feelings.

Most women won’t show if they’re stressed, angry or annoyed. We just bottle those feelings up. Mainly so we can turn around and use them at a later date but my point still stands we hide those kinds of feelings.

Men on the other hand will normally show if they’re angry, stressed or annoyed. They won’t even attempt to hind those kinds of feelings. Most men will however hind any feelings that may lead to them crying. It’s kind of like they’re the wicked witch and tears will cause them to melt.

So you can’t really say women are more emotional them men because we’re not. We just choose more often than not to show emotions that will ruin our makeup. Unlike men who choose to show emotions that will result in them sleeping on the couch.

No one sex is better than the other when it comes to being emotional. We’re just equally as screwed up as one and other.

Have a great night and as always stay safe.

Love,

The Honest Bitch

xoxoxo

Wednesday 15 June 2011

I'm Not That Girl

I’ve reached an age where a lot of my friends are starting to get married off. That’s all well and good for them but I have a problem with it. It’s not with them getting married per se it’s more about them telling me about it and expecting me to be all excited for them. News flash....I’m not that girl.

I’m just not someone who dreams about their wedding day, I never have been. Even as a kid I never pretended to get married or even gave it a thought. It’s not that I’m against marriage or anything like that. I just believe that love is between 2 people and why should hundreds of guests be forced to hear about it.

I actually remember being at Sunday school, my teacher at the time was the pastor’s wife and she decided one Sunday to show us their wedding video. I remember sitting there, while all the girls were crying thinking, “why is she torturing all those people.” (Kids think the darndest things, eh?)

I like to think in every circle of friends each friend as a speciality. Love or matter of love was never mine. In the friendship world my speciality is “break-ups”. If you’re crying at 3am because your boyfriend dumped you, I’m the girl to call. Maybe it’s because I’m a bit of a bitch but bad mouthing the guy that dumped my friend and pointing out all the guys’ flaws comes naturally to me. However if you want to get back with him....it's not advisable to call me.

Clearly I’m not the girl you call when you decide to get married; I’m the girl you call when you decide to called off your wedding. When my friends tell me they’re getting married it takes everything in me not say “Congratulations, call me when you get divorced.” That’s not me being mean that’s just me embracing who I am.

Everyone always says play to your strengths and I do that. Ok, my strengths are a little meaner than most but in the world of friendships I play a vital role.

I love you guys and as always please stay safe.

Love,

The Honest Bitch
xoxo

Sunday 12 June 2011

Four Kinds of Girl

Over all my years of being friends with and dating far too many guy I’ve come to work out that in their minds women fall into 4 main categories, needy, pushy, stupid or bitch. And they will always whiny about a girl no matter which of these categories she falls into. Unless you’re in the process of making him cum, a guy will always find something to bitch about. You can never win; you can just shut him up for extended periods of time.

If you enjoy spending time with your boyfriend, sending texts or talking on the phone with him you fall into the “needy” category. You may be the most impendent person on the planet but when he is out with the guys and you text him even if he messages you first you’re needy. This is where things being so black and white in man-land gets them into trouble, Everyone knows there are different levels of neediness but you’d never know that listening to them talk.

If you have ever asked a guy out, approached a guy or told him to stop playing games you fall into the “pushy” category. In my personal experience sometimes you need to be pushy when it comes to guys but no man will ever see it that way. The only good pushy in the male mind is if you’re pushy in the bedroom. It messes with their male ego otherwise.

Now for the “stupid” category, these are the girl's guys date once with the intention of sleeping with them and never calling again. In my books it’s only stupid if you fall for their bullshit. But once again they’d never admit that in man-land.

The last category is bitch. There are 2 main ways to end up in this category. The first way is be opinionated and have your own views on things. I’ll never understand why women like that rub so many men up the wrong way but a lot of men hate it. The other way is to play the game they do. Show no interest, use them just for sex, and make them come to you. Keep that up for any period of time and they’ll soon be calling you a bitch.

Personally I don’t see anything wrong with being a bitch so they call me one all they like. I have a mind of my own and opinions and I don’t follow men around like a lost puppy so if that makes me a bitch, I’ll own it. Hello world I’m bitch, deal with it!

You’ll never please everyone so don’t every change who you are, especially to please a man. Just be who you are and own it. Sooner or later someone will come along who will take you for what you are. Don’t ever lose any sleep over him either because I’m willing to bet he isn’t losing any over you. Chalk it up to experience and move on.

As always my dears stay safe and don’t stress over things you can’t change.

Love,

The Honest Bitch

xoxoxoxoxo

Sunday 5 June 2011

Keep Off

This may sound weird coming from someone who blogs about every detail of her life but I’m going to say it anyways......... Keep your shit off Facebook!

There are so many reasons why you shouldn’t write your personal business on Facebook, I can’t even think of a good reason to do it, so stop!

First of all you’re making things worse. The second you post your problem with someone else on Facebook you’ve gone from it being between you and the person, to it being the business of everyone on your friends list. It may as well have been on the evening news; it’s in their news feed after all.

So now you have people, possibly perfect strangers add fuel to the flame. Everyone has their 2 cents on the matter. Everyone has advice to give and opinions. And don’t forget the other person is reading this, watching you spread gossip and bad mouthing them so instead of calming down they’re getting angrier.

Because they’re getting angrier they post a status too, so now you have their friends getting involved. Your joint friends end up taking sides. This upsets you both more. Sooner or later you start commenting on each other’s statuses. And the whole thing goes from something small to the worlds ending.

Not sounding like such a good idea now is it?

Might I add just because some of your friends aren’t commenting doesn’t mean they’re not reading what’s going on. And I’m willing to bet most of them are probably thinking you sound like a whiny small child.

Then you have the problem when you two make up that you’re left looking like an idiot to everyone on Facebook. You can’t get around that fact, once it’s all said and done, you’re left with 100’s of Facebook friends who read what was happening, and now think you’re an idiot.

So if you don’t want to be labelled a whiney idiot think before you write a status and take my advice is to keep your shit off Facebook.

I love you guys, and as always stay safe.

Love,

The Honest Bitch
xoxoxoxo

Thursday 24 February 2011

The Honest Bitch Helps

I’m going try something new today. I get asked a lot of relationship questions so instead of answer just the person that asks I figured well I’m not getting any and blog material is limited why not try and get a blog out of it.

Here is my disclaimer, I’m not qualified in any way to give advice, listen to me at your own risk. I will give you the same advice I’d give my best friend and I will be completely honest with you. However people are idiots and things don’t anyways work out.

I will never post the email or message, I will also not post any names this way people can stay anonymous. I’ll just post the question and any important details to that question.

Question: My boyfriend and I have broken up and I want him back, what should I do?

Right now I’m willing to bet you miss the idea of him more then you actually miss him. You miss having someone there that cares about you. This is completely understandable but the answer isn’t running back to a relationship that failed.

Try spending time with your friends. You may not feel like it but do it anyways. Have a girl’s night in watch chick flicks, eat ice cream and gossip. If nothing else it’ll take your mind off things.

When you’re starting to feel better and are ready to go out. Do your makeup and hair and just look hot. If you don’t feel hot, fake it. Some of the best revenge you can have is looking good and having fun. Making him think about what he lost.

I’ve found it takes a week for every month you were together to get over a breakup so do expect a quick fix but if you can keep yourself busy and feel good about yourself, it makes it a lot easier. You guys broke up a reason, chalk it up to bad luck and try to move on.

-The Honest Bitch

I hope that helps a little. It’s the same advice I use myself and give to my friends. If you have any other question, feel free to message me and I’ll try my best to answer them. I’m heading off for the night so as always stay safe.

Love Always

The Honest Bitch
xoxoxo